Tonight, I Love You
by OhThatGirlLeila
Summary: Clare was so distracted that her boyfriend KC broke up with her, she didn't notice the Mysterious Eli until she bumped into him. .He never seen Eyes as Blue as Clare's. He had to get to know her, but a memory from his past stopped him dead in his tracks.
1. A New Beginning

***this is my first fanfiction, but not my first story.***

**-sadly, i mean very sadly i do not own degrassi. (in my head i do) l0l. i dont own the chacters either. But admit it. . . .wouldnt it be nice to own MUNRO CHAMBERS! :D**

**-i do own this story, so yay me! **

****I was listening to Tonight, I Love You by The Latency when i started to write this"HINCE THE TITLE" l0l. please Enjoy!**

**-excuse my typos.**

**Tonight, I love you**

**Chapter 1**

**A New Beginning**

**(Clare POV)**

I've been walking in the park for what seemed hours. I want to be heart-broken I want to feel betrayed, but somehow I couldn't get my heart to agree with my mind. What KC did to me was horrible. He left me for a put out like JENNA? I felt bad for calling her that, even though it was just in my head. I mean she wasn't an ugly girl, but she was a good friend of mine. I was always kind to Jenna, but all this time was planning to steal my boyfriend, my first boyfriend. I thought I loved KC, so why am can't I feel heat-broken?

I was walking, with my head down of course, I was never the confident one; I bumped into someone, hard.

"I'm sorry…" I started but when I looked up I was met by some of the most beautiful emerald eyes I've ever seen. He smirked at me.

"No, I'm sorry. I wasn't watching where I was going; you have nothing to be sorry for. What I jerk I am?" he looked around as if to see where he was in the park. I couldn't move even his voice was gorgeous. He brought his attention back to me. "I'm Eli" he held his hands out.

"Clare." I shook his hand. I don't know if he felt it but I could've sworn there was a spark. I thought I was rude to continue to stare. "So I'll uh…see you around?" He smirked that smirk I was starting to love.

"Guess you will, Blue Eyes." He turned and walked the other way to what seemed like a hearse and drove off. 'So he wore all black and drove a hearse?" I thought. This time my mind screamed for me to stay away, but my heart told me to get to know the real Eli.

**(Eli POV)**

She had the most beautiful blue eyes I've ever seen in my life. They stared up at me with wonder and surprise; I couldn't help but smile when I thought about them. I haven't smiled in a long time. Not since Julia left me. Not since I killed my girlfriend. It was too quiet and for some odd reason driving in Morty wasn't somewhere I wanted to be. I wanted to near her, her blue eyes, her curly hair, her beautiful porcelain face, her perfectly curved lips; I just wanted to near Clare. I shook my head. What was I thinking I can't be happy, not after killing Julia? The thought of Julia made me remember why I was in the park that day. It was the anniversary of her death, and after visiting her grave site, I just needed to clear me head.

I was I realized I was home I got out Morty, and walked inside the house to be greeted by my parents, Cece and Bullfrog.

"Hi Eli. Where you been?" My mom asked, as she beamed in her kitchen apron.

"Hey Cece, Hey Bullfrog." I said acknowledging both my parents. "I just wanted to see Julia before I start Degrassi tomorrow." My dad gave me a small smile.

"That's good son. She would want you to be happy, you know?" My dad asked trying to get up from the table. I giggled at his attempt.

"Yeah Dad, I know. But I don't want to talk about it so I'm going to get ready for school." I turned around, not wanting to see the faces, I've been seeing from them since Julia died a year ago. Once I got to my room I closed the door shutting out the world outside. I remember the nights I use to sit in my old room for what seemed days, shutting out everyone who wasn't Julia. I changed into my pajamas, and climbed into my bed, not wanting to watch TV or log-on to my Skype page. I just closed my eyes, letting sleep take over me.

"_That still doesn't give me the reason as to why I should forgive you again Julia!" I yelled. I was beyond forgiving at this point. How could she have sex with my ex-band mate, at this point._

"_But Eli I love you, and only you. I didn't mean for it to go that far. I'm here for you Elijah!" Her grey eyes pleaded with me as she spoke those words. But I was so angry not even her eyes can soften my emotions. I was still very hurt. _

"_Julia, don't call me that. I'm obviously not in the mood." I warned. "But since you didn't want it to go THAT far, how far you wanted to go?" I noticed a scared look flashed her face. If I would've blinked, I would've missed it. _

"_Sam and I been messing around for about a month, but I didn't mean anything Eli, because I love you and I am so sorry." She rushed. I noticed my blood became boiling under my skin. I looked around to notice we were standing outside the restaurant my parent took me and my older brother to, the one she followed us to. Some people were staring at us from inside, and I was clearly fed up so I decided I didn't want to hear anymore._

"_Julia, get away from me." I said with as much venom in my voice I could make. _

"_Eli, please give me a chance." She pleaded. _

'_NOW JULIA! GET AWAY FROM ME! I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!" I yelled and turned around. But I didn't walk in. _

"_I'm sorry." She whispered, as she backed into the streets. And then it happened before anybody realized what was going on. All I heard was a car shriek and Julia horrid screams filled the air. I quickly turned around to see her lying lifeless on the ground, as the coward in the car sped off before I could see them. I ran over and grabbed Julia in my arms. _

"_Please don't leave me Jules. Please don't go." I whispered as tears came down my crashing down cheeks. I wanted her to be gone out of my life as in not being my girlfriend. Not as her dying._

_She looked up at me with lazy eyes, her grey eyes as clear as ever. "I love you, Eli. I'm sorry." I started screaming as she closed her eyes. I held onto her as if my life depended on it. Someone touched my shoulder. I heard my mother voice. _

"It's okay Eli." My eyes shot open_. _I looked around and noticed it was just a dream. My mom walks to my door. "It's just a dream baby boy." She closed the door behind her. I sat up in my bed. I looked at the clock it read **7:18. **I rolled my eyes.

"Ugh, it's time for Degrassi." i said smugly as i got out of bed.

**-AUTHORS NOTE-**

***So what did you think. Please review. your reveiws are needed. THANKS!**


	2. It's A Beautiful Sight

**-*tear* i do not own the wonderful degrassi. I do not own the character either. just my story. But come'on guys Munro Chambers is awesome. RIGHT? As well as **

**-this is my second chapter. But i was Listening to Last Chance by Nicki Minaj and Natasha Bedingfield while writing this. If you like Rap and Pop I think you will like that.**

**-I love you guys keep reviewing! THANKS :)**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 2**

**It's A Beautiful Sight**

**(Clare POV)**

"How could he choose that brain dead blonde over you?" Alli asked as we walked out of our first block class.

Why couldn't she just let it go? I have. I watched my bestfriend Alli Bhandari go on and on about how much of a jerk she thought KC is. I rolled my eyes. I grabbed her by the shoulders.

"Alli, I love you, but you have to let it go." I said into her eyes slowly stretching the 'o' in go.

"Why Clare, he was such a Jerk to leave someone as amazing as you for someone who's as desperate as her." She said suddenly reminded the reasons she hated Jenna herself. Alli had secretly liked Dave Turner, but Jenna knew Dave liked her and Alli both, so she asked him to the Girls Choice Dance before Alli could see him after class.

"It's not that serious Alli. I mean, it is and I was hurt, but admit it, me and KC Guthrie lost our fire once he found football." Alli looked as if she was considering it.

"And besides Alli, are you taking out your frustration out on that thing that happened with Dave?" I said with a menacing grin. She gave me a death stare.

"Its not the same Clare." She said quickly. She looked around to see if anyone heard me. Then she looked back at me. "I'm over it by the way. I noticed Dave wasn't exactly my type. Now with you, that was still heartless on KC's behalf Clare-Bear."

I sighed. "Jenna isn't the only one at fault here, KC WAS my boyfriend."

"Well he shouldn't have broken up with you like that in front of Jenna. And you were the only one who gave her a chance at first when she first got here." I nodded finally agreeing with Alli. She did have a point.

Once we made it to my locker my mind wandered to yesterday, the first day of my tenth grade year, the last day of my relationship. KC walked up to me at my locker. It was lunch hour and I wanted to sit with him.

"Hi KC. Ready for lunch?" I said happy for lunch.

"Uh Clare-Bear, need to talk." He said looking nervous. He ran his hand through his hair.

"Sure KC go ahead." I encourage him to go on. That's when I noticed Jenna two lockers down obviously staring at us. He looked back to where my eyes went, and suddenly gained confidence.

"I think we should break up." My world slowed down. Was this really happening, I thought. I looked back up at him.

"Why KC? I know we weren't close during the break but I thought it could change once we came back to school."

"It's not you Clare, you are a great person, but me and Jenna," Jenna walked up beside him. "We sort of like each other, and want to be together." I looked at Jenna and noticed a grin on her face. As I looked at her something she said to me when she first got here struck a nerve. _"I was such a boyfriend stealer at my old school."_ I looked at them both in disgust.

"I hope you two enjoy each other." I said to KC and walked off before they could see me in tears.

"HELLO . . . Earth to Clare." Alli said waving her hand in my face. I was just staring inside my locker. I gave an apologetic smile and started to grab my thing out my locker. She was babbling about this cute new boy named Drew Torres she met and wanted to get to know. I was about to close my locker and walk away until I heard the empty locker next to mine open. I didn't know there was someone who moved inside. I turned to my side to meet my new locker neighbor, and it was him. It was Eli. Was I that hooked into KC that I didn't notice him before? No, I know he wasn't here yesterday. He has to be new. I turned back to my locker before he realized I was staring. I was about to walk away when he said my name.

**(Eli POV)**

"Clare, right?" She turned around and looked at me. It was her, her sky blue eyes and autumn curls. I thought I would never see the girl from the park again, but there she was closing the locker next to mine.

"Yea, Eli isn't it." She said with a fake confused look her face. 'She's as sarcastic as I am. I'm going to enjoy this.' I smirked.

"Yea, like you really forgot my name." She smiled.

"I can say the same for you." She raised an eyebrow. I looked away as I smiled. She looked at her confused friend. "Alli, this is Eli, we met in the park yesterday. Eli, this is Alli, my best friend." I gave a friendly head nod towards her way, and she smiled at me.

"I will see you in study hall, bye." She said before she looked at me again and walked away. Clare looked back at me.

"Are you new?"

"Not really, you see last year, I walked around as Invisible Man, because I was too shy." I smirked. She smiled and rolled her beautiful blue eyes.

"That explains everything Eli." She turned and started to walk away. She stopped and turned around as if she forgot something. "Oh, and Welcome To Degrassi." She walked down the hall, her curls bouncing and her perfect hips swaying. There was a special light around Clare, and being near it made me happy. 'Why is it that she has the effect to make me smile?' I thought walking towards my tenth grade Trigonometry class. 'Yippee.' I sighed quietly eyeing my schedule. I remembered how Julia loved math and was on College Prep Math classes in the eighth grade. I shook my head trying not to let Julia influence my thoughts for today. As I walked into class, I noticed my friend from this summer reading a comic book, and sat down in the desk besides him.

"Can it be more pathetic that I secretly like Fantastic Four now?" I asked taking the comic out of my bag and sitting it on his desk. Adam looked up at me as if it was the worst news he have heard.

"Very pathetic, Bro." He said giving me a fist bump. Adam didn't have many friends since he was new as well, so the day we met at the comic book story we became Bros. "The Punisher will always kick ass." He said holding up his book.

The bell had rung and the teacher was teaching a new lesson, but my mind wasn't on the math problem being worked on the board, it was on the sky blue eyes I say this morning. 'How is it possible to have eyes bluer that the sky?' I was day dreaming when I realized the bell had rung. I stood up and walked to my locker hoping to see Clare again. But she wasn't around. Adam and I noticed we had the next class together so we walked into class. That's when I realized Clare was sitting in my third block Literature 11 Class.

I was really enjoying Degrassi at this point.

**-Author's Note-**

**How did you like it. I hope it wasnt too wordy for you.**


	3. Your Eyes Says Enough

**-i do not own the greatest show on the planet. thats degrassi. sigh. i dont own the characters. double sigh. i do own the story :)**

**-i was pretty bored today so i decided to write three chapters today! IM ON A ROLL! l0l. **

**-i thank you guys for the reviews. Pease keep reviewing I get really happy reading them.**

***btw i was listening to The Mortician's Daughter by the Black Veil Brides _(BEST BAND EVERR!) _and I'll Be Loving You Long Time by Mariah Carey. i like her voice.**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 3**

**Your Eyes Says Enough**

**(Eli POV)**

I sat in the desk in front of her hoping to get her attention. It worked perfectly. I felt her chair shift as she leaned in by my ear.

"You know, I'm not afraid to tell Simpson you're stalking me." She whispered. I smiled and turned around to face her. I faked a hurt look.

"I thought you enjoyed my presence Blue Eyes? Now I feel like an ass for transferring into this class." I then gave her my signature smirk. "You do enjoy my presence right?" I saw a blush rose onto her cheeks. 'I think I like this' I thought. I waited for her to respond.

"I uh…I don't…sure, maybe." She stumbled.

"Wow for the first time no comeback?" She looked up into my eyes. "I enjoy your presence." She looked around the room quickly and leaned up so our faces were inches away.

"I have to warn you though. . . If you enjoy my presence for too long you might fall in love with me. "As she said that her blue eyes felt as if they was looking into my soul, reading my heart, and melting away the painful memories. I didn't think about Julia, I didn't think about our fight, I didn't think about my fears; I thought about Clare, how she might be the cure for the nightmares, the cure for my misery, the cure for my heart. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to forget about Julia. I didn't want to lose the good memories we shared, I wanted to be able to stop feeling guilty, I want to stop obsessing, and I need to stop hurting. But I couldn't do that to Clare. I couldn't lead her on knowing, knowing I can't love her in all the ways I could because I am afraid, because I am a murderer. After she learns my secret, she will reject me, and I don't know if I will be able to handle that. Adam knows my secret and he haven't left me hanging, but he's not my type.

What if she never wants to talk to me afterwards?

Clare noticed my mind was wondering so she smirked and leaned back into her chair twirling her ring.

"But that won't happen." She said barely above a whisper.

"And. . ." I started before Mrs. Dawes started talking.

"Mr. Goldsworthy, Ms. Edwards I need your attention please." She said looking over her glasses.

I looked at her before I turned around in my chair.

I have to admit, English, Literature was my favorite subject. It was the only class I can get straight A's in. All the other class I was destined to only make C's. But I don't try in those other classes as much as I can either. I sighed quietly and thought about Clare and the Assignment Mrs. Dawes was handing us. We had to write about an experience that changed our lives completely.

Oh great, another thing I have to do to make me think about Julia.

**(Clare POV)**

"But that won't happen"

I replayed our conversation over and over in my head as I walked home. Eli's presence made me feel confident. Of course I enjoyed it. I said the things in my mind, I was usually afraid to say out loud. But look at me. I'm not beautiful enough for Eli. He only flirted with me because I was the first girl he knew here. KC grew tired of me, and so will Eli.

I looked up at my door, not really wanting to go inside. I wonder what my mom will blame me for tonight. Will it be the divorce? Will it be Darcy's death? Or will tonight be one of those nice nights we have with each other.

I held my breath and walked inside. I looked around and noticed no one home so I let my breath go in relief. I walked up the stairs and opened my room door. My room was my escape from the cruel world outside. I thought being with KC would make the world better, but he made it lonelier now that he left me. I thought about Eli and I knew it was impossible to like him since I know nothing about him and don't anything about me.

I kind of wanted it to stay that way. He didn't need to know that my first boyfriend dumped me for a put out. He didn't need to know my dad got tired of mother and decided he's better off alone. He didn't need to know my mother verbally abuse me every other night. He didn't need to know my sister killed herself because she was raped at a ski party and had so many nightmares she couldn't bear to live.

I missed Darcy. She made me feel beautiful about myself. She was so confident and beautiful, and she didn't need to have sex with a guy to make him fall in love with her. I admired her for that. But she did want to have sex with Peter because; well anyone could tell he loved her unconditionally. She never got the chance; she never gave herself a chance. And I still feel that I could've stopped it, I could've stopped her from dying. I guess my mom felt I could've stopped it too because every since then I was blamed.

As I was looking through my sister's pictures, I heard the front door open and close, and I waited. I waited to find out how my night was going to end. I slowly closed the photo album and put it on my night stand.

"CLARE. . ." I held my breath. "I brought Chinese Take-out." I exhaled thinking this was a good start. I jumped off my bed and ran down the stairs.

"Hi Mom." I said hoping I didn't speak too soon. She turned around with a sincere smile on her face.

"Hello Clare-Bear. How was your day?"

We ate dinner and talked as if we were a happy family. I told her about my second day of school and how great it was going. Once I got into my room, I logged on to my IM page and noticed I had a friend request from Eli. Of course, I accepted it, and I waited until he IM me.

**Eli-Golds: **I see you accepted me ;)

**ClareRockx: **yea. You seemed desperate.

**Eli-Golds: **Ouch Edwards, that's gonna leave a mark.

I giggled at his fake hurt.

**ClareRockx:** sorry, I didn't think that a guy that wore all black like you could easily get his feelings hurt.

**Eli-Golds: **there's more to me than what meets the eye Edwards.

I thought long about what he said. What could it mean? I wanted to get to know the real Eli Goldsworthy. I looked at my screen as another message from Eli popped on the screen.

**Eli-Golds:** I have to warn you though. . . If you get to know the real me you might fall in love with me.

_Eli-Golds is offline._

**_-_Author's Note-**

**I decided to start with Eli's POV this time instead of Clare's. Tell me how you feel. Review. Thanks love you guys!**


	4. Reminisce: Brown Eyes

**-you know i hate the fact i do not own Degrassi. such an awesome show. but i own my story.**

***so sorry i haven't updated since saturday i had to spend time with my daddy down his house. **

****songs i was listening to were Whatya Want From Me by Adam Lambert and Shark in the Water by VV Brown.**

**-btw this chapter is mostly clare's dream. it would be italicized. the end of the Italic means end of the dream. **

**sorry if thats a uh spoiler? l0l. Enjoy. please review. & yes i love your reviews please kee it up. :) :)**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 4**

**Reminisce: Brown Eyes**

**(Clare POV)**

_I opened the door, and I noticed it was oddly quiet in the house. Usually when Darcy's at home its loud because of all her music. I looked around the living room to see what's going on. Everything looked the same, everything smelled the same, but it was the sound that threw me off. Every since Darcy got back from the trip she's been rebellious, and loud I must say. I was looking forward to our normal arguments. It became a routine. But today, today something was not right._

_"Hello…Darcy? Are you home?" I yelled but she didn't answer._

_Then I heard something fall from Darcy's room. I ran upstairs to see what exactly was happening. I slowly opened her door to find Darcy looking out of the window._

_"Hey Darce, I didn't think you were home. Are you okay?" She turned around and looked at me. Her brown eyes were filled with tire and pain. I never seen my sister look at me that way before, I knew something had to be wrong._

_"DARCY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?" I yelled hopefully getting through to her._

_"Life, Clare." She simply answered and turned back to the window._

_"What does that mean Darcy?" I walked up to where she was standing. She glanced down at me._

_"Have you ever noticed how you can be surrounded by a sea full of people, and still feel lonely? That's me Clare-bear. I feel lonely everywhere I go. I'm lonely with Peter. I'm lonely here at my own home, Clare."_

_She looks up at the sky. "Do you still have faith in God?"_

_"Of course Darcy." I answered. How could she ask that?_

_"Why?" She looked at my confused._

_"Because I know he is looking after me. I know he loves me and he will never forsake me. They teach us this at church."_

_"I know, I know." She glances at me. She looks back up in the sky. "But if God loves me so, why is he putting me through so much? If he is looking after me, why did I get raped? If he will never forsake me, why do I feel so alone?"_

_"I don't know Darce. Maybe it's part of his plan for your life." She snapped her head back my way._

_"His PLAN? Really Clare, his plan?" she looked disgusted. "His plan sucks." She walked away from the window. Something was off about Darcy today. She looked as if she had things on her mind._

_She looked back at me with the tired and pained expression again. "I'm not a child anymore Clare. So why do they feel the need to tell me fairytales?"_

_"I don't know Darcy." I couldn't answer my sister. After all, I was only a ninth grader. All I knew was that I would be in Degrassi tomorrow for the first time._

_"I know you are too young Clare, and Mom and Dad are too old to understand me. You're all I have to tell these things to." Darcy looked at her phone and I noticed she had an incoming call from Peter. She ignored it and continued to talk to me. "Clare, sometimes I feel that living is over-rated."_

_"Why would you say that Darcy? You have everything; family, friends, a house, food. Everyone that looks at you adores you. I will always be The Ugly Clare, Gorgeous Darcy's little sister." Tears stared to fall from my eyes. I never admitted how I felt to Darcy before. But the way she was talking was scaring me. She looked down at me._

_"See Clare, I caused you heartache."_

_"No Darcy, it's not your fault you got the looks and I got the brains." Darcy rubbed her hand over her face. I looked down; I usually walked around with my head high around my parents. I knew I didn't fit in, that was the reason for the uniform. My parents thought I felt confident about myself. Boy were they wrong. I had long greasy hair, and dorky glasses. The uniform I wore made me look more of a reject. Darcy put her hand on my shoulders._

_"Clare, you are very beautiful." She looks at my uniform. "Look at how you dress and carry yourself. I'm not saying dress like me; but dress with confidence. . . .You need a make-over. Maybe a haircut, and I don't know, laser eye surgery. . . I heard Mom and Dad discussing it." I looked up. I know I had a smile as wide as Texas on my face._

_"Really Darce?" She smiled back at me._

_"Maybe. . .just talk to them about it; tonight at Dinner." I looked out the window and tried to picture myself with my hair and glasses. I couldn't see it._

_The front door closed meaning one of our parents was home._

_"Girls, get washed up for dinner. Your father will be home in 30 minutes." Our Mom yelled from the kitchen. I stood up not wanting to leave my conversation with Darcy. Mostly I was afraid to leave her alone. She read the expression on my face._

_"Clare, it's okay. Go ahead and get ready for dinner. I love you little sister._

_"Are you sure you are okay?" Darcy stood up and walked to the window and looked at the sky._

_"Soon, I will be." She said barely above a whisper. She looked back at me. "Yes Clare-bear, I'm fine." I turned around and walked to my room._

_**{Dinner}**_

_Darcy was awfully chatty tonight. She even said grace tonight. My parents weren't complaining, they were just happy that Darcy was finally talking again. Her eyes were still the same but she had a smile on face so her eyes were hard to read. My dad broke me out of my thought._

_"Clare-Bear you're quiet tonight; are you okay?" I looked up at him._

_"Yea Dad I'm fine, really." He shook his head, but you can tell he didn't buy it._

_"Dad I think Clare should get a full make-over. A haircut and maybe that laser eye surgery you guys were talking about." Darcy looked at me with a sincere smile._

_"You're right Darce, she should. Charles, we should she would have so much confidence." My mom said. How did she know I didn't have confidence in my appearance? My dad looked as if he was thinking about it._

_"Well there goes my birthday surprise, Diane." My dad said with a smile. I jumped up and down._

_"Really Dad?"_

_"Yes pumpkin, a supreme make-over for my little bear."_

_The rest of dinner went into conversations about my make-over. It was one of the best dinners we've had in a long time. Once dinner was over me, my sister, and my parents sat in the living room watching movies and making appointments for my surgery. Darcy and I still had school so we excused ourselves._

_"Mom, Dad you guys are the best parents a girl could ask for, and I love you guys." Darcy said before getting up._

_"We love you too sweetheart." My mother said. My dad looked up._

_"Ditto kid." He said with a smile. She gave them a tight hug and a kiss. She walked up to me and that look I saw on her face earlier was on there again._

_"I love you Clare-Bear." We stopped at Darcy's door. "And whatever that goes on in life is not your fault. You are the best sister a girl can have."_

_"I love you too, Darcy." She hugged me very tight. We broke up and I looked up at her confused. She smiled at my expression. She took off my glasses._

_"See look at you, don't ever let anyone tell you that you aren't beautiful. Just let them know 'I'm Darcy's little sister. I know I'm beautiful.'" She smiled and handed me back my glasses. I walked to my room door. "Good night Clare."_

_"Good night Darcy." As I was closing my door I can hear Darcy quietly say, 'I will surely miss that kid.' But I didn't pay it any attention._

_**{2:30 AM}**_

_I jumped up in cold sweats. Something wasn't right. Something was wrong. I could feel it. I couldn't sleep, and it was getting irritating. I got up out of bed to get some water from the kitchen._

_Once I came back from the kitchen I wanted to just look in at Darcy. Something was telling me to stop by her room. As I walked in I noticed she was lying on top of the covers with her dinner clothes still on. I walked over to wake her up. Once I touched her she was very cold. I tried to turn her over but she was too heavy. I tried to move her body to the middle of her bed. As I was pushing her over an empty Aspirin bottle rolled to my feet. I picked it up confused because I know Mom just brought that bottle for her head yesterday. I looked back up at Darcy and it clicked. I started shaking her hard._

_"Wake up Darcy please." I ran over to the other side of her bed to try to see her face. And that's when a Darcy's big brown eyes were looking back at me._

_"MOM, DAD!" I started walking back until I hit the wall and slid down. I started rocking back in forth. This couldn't have happened. How come I didn't see it? Why was I so stupid and blind? I could've stopped her; I could've told Mom and Dad, this is my fault. Mom and Dad came running into the room. They looked at me then Darcy. They were trying to wake her up, my dad started calling 9-11 and my mom came over to me and started crying._

_"Charles how could we let this happened!" She screamed. My dad looked at my mom, his eyes filled with tears. He walked over to us._

_"Diane it's nothing we could've done. We took Darcy to counseling; we did all we could do."_

_"No we didn't. It's no way we did. Our daughter is DEAD Charles!" I couldn't believe my mom and dad were about to have their first major argument in front of my dead sister's body._

_"We couldn't watch Darcy like watch dogs Di, so I don't see how we could've stopped this."_

_"We could've been better parents and talked to her, something Charles."_

_"WELL IT'S TOO LATE NOW DIANE. SHE'S GONE NOW." My dad was now crying as hard as my mom. They started screaming even louder at each other and I couldn't take it any longer._

_"STOP! STOP ALL THE ARGUING; STOP ALL THE FIGHTING IN FRONT OF MY SISTER! SHE'S DEAD FOR GOODNESS SAKE PLEASE LETS SHOW HER BODY SOME RESPECT!" I started crying hysterically at this point. How dare they argue in front of her the way they did. They walked over to me and put their arms around me and I cried harder into their shoulders._

I hopped up and looked around my room. I touched my face and noticed I've been crying. I haven't had this dream in over six months. Why was I having it now? I looked at my clock and noticed it was 2:30 in the morning. What was the date? I jumped up from my bed and to look at calendar. It couldn't be. I backed away from the calendar; it was August 9, 2010. How could I forget? I fell to the floor and cried myself back to sleep.

**-Author's Note-**

**Hope you enjoyed this. My longest Chapter. I decided Clare needed one chapter to herself. Maybe i should Eli's own Chapter later on in the story? (just a thought) **

**Sorry for typos. tell me what cha think! love ya!**


	5. Way To Go

***by all means i do not own degrassi. :( and i do not own the characters. :( but i do own this story line :)**

**- the songs i was listening to are Evacuate The Dancefloor by Casada and Tonight, I Love You by The Latency.**

**-*btw sorry i havent been uploading. This year my holiday break have been busy.**

**&& i've been sick. :( but i wrote 3,000 words for this chapter to make it up. **

**please PLEASE excuse my typos. and PLEASE enjoy! && if you have time you can review too. **

**i would appreciate it. :D**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 5**

**Way To Go**

**(Eli POV)**

I hopped out of Morty and walked into the school. Half of my mind was focused on printing out my assignment for Mrs. Dawes; the other half was looking for those beautiful blue eyes.

Last night, I decided to log off to leave Clare wondering about what I had said. I enjoyed talking to Clare. She wasn't like most girls. She spoke her mind.

I would never admit this to her for two reasons. One, because it was way too soon to be into someone the way I was into Clare. Besides, I want to make sure I really liked Clare, and not rush into anything. And two, I didn't deserve her; I had my chance. Julia was my chance.

I walked into the school's library. I looked around the room and noticed Alli, Clare's loud and obnoxious best friend, at a computer. I wanted to know where Clare was, so I took the risk in sitting beside her. She didn't notice me walking towards her because she was too focused on the computer.

I sat down at the computer next to her and pulled up my paper.

"Ugh, why can't I get this paper to upload?" She said irritated. She looked up and noticed I was sitting beside her. "Oh, hi Eli."

"Have you seen Clare?" Wow, that sounded was rude. I didn't noticed how badly I wanted Alli to say something to me, until she actually did. I gave her an apologetic smile. She looked at me and turned her head. I could see her slightly rolling her eyes.

She looked back in my direction.

"You know, a proper hello could've worked. No need to be rude." She looked back at her computer. "And no, I haven't. She might be late today." She looked like she wanted to ask me another question, but instead turned back to the computer.

I was about to ask her what was on her mind, but I decided not to. I might regret asking. I stood up from my computer and logged off. Alli stood up the same time I did.

"Thanks, Alli." I said, remembering to be polite. I'm not a mean person. I'm just not so much of a people person.

"Whatever Eli." She said and walked away. That was probably a bad idea to make Alli mad. I can hear her telling Clare to stay away from me.

As I walked down the now crowded hallway, I saw Adam sitting in front of the lockers. It was almost funny how Clare's locker is on my right and Adam's was on my left. Lucky me right?

I walked up to Adam who looked very engrossed in his book.

"You know dude, if you continue to sit here and read comics, no girl would ever look at you." I laughed sitting next to him.

"I have no trouble in the ladies. Now you shouldn't be the one to talk, with your crush on Clare and all." I shot him a look.

"Shut up man, I don't have a crush, she's just my friend."

"Yeah, yeah; and all that flirting between you guys yesterday wasn't amusing." He laughed, making a couple of people near us look our way.

"Shut it man," I said looking around, "and besides it's only the second day of school. How can I possibly have a crush on her?"

"Man I don't know, but you do. Maybe you should ask her out."

"No way, dude. So I can get close to her and she leaves me. Just drop it."

"She's not Julia it won't…"

"Adam, I said drop it, now." I said between my teeth. He was really aggravating me. He gave me an apologetic look.

"I'm just saying Eli. You know maybe it's time to move on." I thought about what Adam was saying but I knew it would be impossible.

Adam hit my arm lightly. "Hey, man Clare Edwards at ten o'clock." I turned to see what he was looking at, and there she was walking towards us.

"Hey you guys." She said opening her locker I could tell she wasn't happy. Her eyes looked sadden.

As I was about to stand up that wannabe football star, KC Guthrie, walked up to her.

Now this should be interesting.

**(Clare POV) **

Today was not my day. After my realization last night I barely slept. And I know I wasn't in a great mood. I have a feeling the third day is gonna suck, just as the first. As I was walking down the hall, I noticed Eli and Adam sitting, having an intense conversation. I can tell by the look on Eli's face.

"Hey you guys"

They didn't say anything. I looked from up my locker. I looked at Eli whose eyes were looking past me. I turned around and noticed KC standing beside me. Why didn't I notice him before?

Ugh, this can't be good.

"Hey, Clare." He smiled his award winning smile; the smile I thought was so cute, but now realized it was annoying.

"Hello KC." I didn't want to have conversation with him. I turned and looked back into my locker. In the corner of my eye I can see Eli totally enjoying himself in our conversation. He looked curious.

"So are you going to stop hanging with us completely Clare-Bear? I would really like it if we were still friends."

"You have some real nerves KC. And stop calling me Clare-Bear."

"Come 'on don't be such a baby Clare." That struck a nerve. Not today buddy. Mess with me any other day, but not today.

"I am not being a baby KC, so leave me alone." I closed my locker. When I looked back at him he had a cocky smirk on his lips.

"So you are telling me, you don't wanna be friends?" He walked up closer to me. "After all we've been through." I stepped back.

"Yes, I'm not ready to be friends. And by you leaving me that told me you didn't care about everything we "shared"."

He grabbed my hand. "Clare-Bear, of course I care." I snatched my hand as if it was set on fire.

"KC, when did you become so . . . disgusting." I made the most repulsive look I had. He has changed. And it was so obvious you can smell it coming though his skin. The nerve of some people. And by some people I mean KC Guthrie.

"I'm still the same, Clare. Look maybe we can talk about it later. I don't wanna be late for class." He touched my hair.

"We have nothing to talk about." As I was taking my hand from my face, Jenna walked up.

Oh Joy.

"What are you doing to MY boyfriend?" She said putting her hand on her hips. Is this girl that dysfunctional?

"Your "Boyfriend" is here at my locker Jenna." They are really starting to push my buttons. I can feel my anger rising up my neck.

"KC warned me you would probably try to win him back." Okay, its official; Jenna's nuts.

Everyone ear distance from us were now in the conversation.

"Let's go Jenna." KC said suddenly tuning into what was actually happening. She shook him off.

"Let him go Saint Clare. He left you for me for a reason." This girl is incredible.

"Because you are a put-out Jenna. You gave him what I didn't want; sex." Her face was turning red. She walked up to me.

"No because you are an Ugly, Nerdy Bitch, who couldn't keep a dog interested in you."

"Well your dog is surely interested."

Just when she was about to say something back Eli came and stood in front of me.

"Okay that's enough whoever you are. Obviously you are too much of a bitch, yourself, to realize KC came to see Clare. Both of you need to get a life." He grabbed my arms and lightly pulled me away from the scene.

Once we made it outside near his hearse, he stopped and stood in front of me. He looked me in my eyes.

"Are you okay?" I just looked at him.

"She's right."

"No she's not Clare." How can he say that?

"Yes she is Eli. It was obvious no guy really liked me. I am a Nerd and I am ugly. I knew these things already."

"You really think that Clare?" I turned away from him and walked to his car. So far this day was very crappy.

Eli walked over and sat on the hearse's hood.

"Eli it's too difficult to explain."

"Well you can try." The bell rung for us to go to class. We both looked back towards the school.

"Too late . . . Bell rung." He looked back at me. Then down at the car.

"Let's get away from here."

"You mean Skip?"

"If we are getting technical, then yeah I mean skip."

"Eli, I don't know. . . Are we skipping the whole day?" He lifted his eyebrow and hopped off the hood. I stood up straight. "We could get in trouble."

"It's up to you Edwards." Maybe I did need this escape. I can see how the rest of the day was going to go. I already had to deal with the anniversary of my sister's death. I didn't want to deal with my ex and his girlfriend.

I stood up straight and fixed my bag.

"Let's do it." He looked at me and smile.

"Are you sure?"

"Are you backing down already?" He laughed and walked over to open the door for me.

"Morty Awaits."

**(Eli POV)**

Clare smiled widely and got inside of Morty. Once I got inside, I noticed she was looking at me.

"What?"

"Morty? You named your hearse Morty?"

"What's wrong with the name Morty? I happen to think that name rocks."

"Typical guy."

"By naming my hearse Morty, makes me a typical guy?"

"Yes, guys tend to name their car."

"What . . . Girls do it?"

"No we don't Eli." I looked at her and shook my head. I put the key into the ignition.

"Can we at least leave schools grounds before we get into the gruesome argument?" She giggled.

"So my argument is horrible, to you? And where are we heading?"

"Let's Go to The DOT; and yes Clare, Yes it is." She laughed; I couldn't help but to laugh with her. As I turned the key into the ignition the ending to _Knives and Pens by Black Veil Brides_ were blaring from the speakers. I turned the volume down and looked at Clare. She had a horrified look on her face. I couldn't help but to laugh harder.

"What was that?"

"That is the Black Veil Brides. They are my favorite Screamo band; along with BlesstheFall."

"Bless the who?" Then the DJ's voice was on the radio.

"Next on the countdown is _Higinia by BlesstheFall_." He said and the intro to the song came on.

"Them." I said and pointed to the radio. Clare looked disapproving at first then she smiled.

"Well, that is interesting"

"Goodness Clare, please don't tell me you are a Bieber."

"Why yes I am. He is super cute. And that Baby, Baby song is genius." She said putting her hand on her chest.

"Edwards, you are a disappointment, you know that?"

"Well not all of us like people screaming at us like the exorcist Goldsworthy." That hit a pressure point. I was serious about my music.

"Clare it's nothing like the exorcist. Not everyone likes that happy, bouncy shit."

"Wow way to take it personal Eli." She looked down.

I let out a big sigh.

"My bad, I just take this serious Clare. But that still don't give me the okay to get frustrated with you."

"It's fine. I swear." She looked down at her hands. What I was about to say I knew I was gonna regret saying it.

"You can change the radio if you want to."

"No Eli I couldn't, I shouldn't intrude." This is sounding more like a spay movie.

I stopped at a stop sign.

"It's okay Clare." She looked at me to see if I was serious. I gave her a smile and started driving towards The DOT. Clare was turning through the stations when she heard a song she liked and started singing along.

_Oh, Oh Evacuate the Dancefloor._

_Oh, Oh I'm infected by the sound._

_Oh, Oh stop this beat is killing me._

_Hey Mr. DJ lets burn this place right down to the ground._

Once she finished she looked at me.

"Evacuate the Dancefloor by Casada. It's sort of my favorite song now." I turned off the car.

"See bouncy and happy." She laughed at my comment and got out. She put her head back in the door before she closed it.

"I guess it's like I'm day and you're night." I got out of the car and walked over to her. She closed the door.

"Is being dark and mysterious a bad thing?" I can tell Clare was blushing. Her cheeks turned slightly red.

"No, but is being bright as day a bad thing." I can tell she wanted to play hard to get, so I began to play with her. I shrug my shoulders. I brought my face closer to hers.

"I don't know blue eyes. I don't see a problem with it." She walked around me, and started walking towards The DOT. I was still there where she left me. I turned around to watch her.

She opened the door, and looked back at me.

"Are you coming Mr. Dark and Mysterious?" I ran up to her and whispered in her ear.

"As long as Clare-Bear can be a good girl, and play nicely." Clare's face turned a darker pink as she smiled. I moved my face to let her walk inside. I went to a table in the back of the café. Clare walked over to the counter to talk to the blonde dude behind it. I sat down and looked out of the window. Before I knew what was happening a pair of hands was around my eyes, and that's when Clare's apple shampoo was all I could smell.

"You know, Mr. Goldsworthy, dark and mysterious isn't always attractive, but lucky for you, I know a girl who just might be interested." She moved her hands away from my eyes, and walked over to her seat in front of me.

"And who might that be Clare?" I said. Man was I enjoying this game or what? She looked around me and pointed her head.

"Her"

I turned around to see who she was talking to and I saw a mannish looking lady with a mustache stuffing her face with an English muffin. I quickly turned back around and playfully glared at Clare.

"Watch it Edwards."

In that little time I learned so much about Clare. I learned that her favorite band is actually Paramore and her favorite song was Decode by Paramore. That was a relief I can live with Paramore; besides Decode rocked. I learned the little things that others would've found unimportant to know.

Since I dropped Clare off at home, I realized I couldn't get her off mind. I still can't believe she doesn't think that she is beautiful. Everything about her face was perfect. Everything about her body was perfect.

I walked inside my room and kicked off my shoes. I turned on my laptop logging onto my Skype, and walked over to my bed. I wanted to just relax for the rest of the night. I didn't realized how exhausted I was until I actually sat on my bed.

I opened my drawer rambling for my iPod touch, when my finger ran across a picture frame. I pulled the frame out the drawer and noticed it was a picture of Julia. I stared at the picture. A wave of guilt ran through my mind.

A beep came from my laptop. I looked up to see who messaged me.

**ClareRockx: **I had a good time today Eli. Thanks!

Something in the back of my mind was screaming at me to not get involved with Clare. I didn't need to hurt her. If she knew about Julia she would go running for the hills anyway, so I might as well save both of us the heartache.

**Eli-Golds: **I'm glad you had a good time. It seemed like you needed a pick me up!

**ClareRockx:** Wow and I thought you did it to get closer to me.

**Eli-Golds: **Sorry to lead you on.

**ClareRockx:** Eli it was a joke. Are you okay?

**Eli-Gold:** Clare, I'm fine. I just have a lot on my mind. Don't really want to be bothered.

**ClareRockx:** Well I'm sorry I bothered you Eli Goldsworthy. I won't BOTHER you anymore.

_ClareRockx is Offline _

Way to Go Elijah

-**Author's Note-**

**Poor Eli went from happy to crappy. it will get better so please dont shoot me. l0l.**

**&& one of the reviews gave me an idea to do some KC drama. So I DID IT! && its far from over. **


	6. Count On You

**-Okay now its getting sort of sad to keep reminding myself that i do not own Degrassi nor their characters. **

**But i have to admit i am happy i own this storyline. so YAY ME!**

***the song i were listening to were Shake by Jesse McCartney and Stolen by Dashboard Confessions.**

**-Excuse my typos and thanks for the Reviews. You guys bring me great joy. Honestly! please keep reviewing.**

**oh btw i got the title for this Chapter from Big Time Rush's Song Count on You with Jordin Sparks. l0l.**

**So enough with my rambling. . . .ENJOY!**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 6**

**Count On You**

**(Clare POV)**

The nerves of some people!

My mood went from crap to good then all the way back down to crap within 12 hours. Eli was just happy before he dropped me off so what could actually bring his joy down? I've known him for three days and he is already making me regret it.

No, wait, I take that back. Eli was a good friend for stopping my petty argument with Jenna before Principal Simpson came into sight. Then it wasn't going to pretty if my mother had to come up to the school.

The thought of my mother made me quickly look at the clock. She was supposed to been home 30 minutes ago. I stood up and walked to my dresser looking in the mirror. My face didn't look as bad as it did this morning, but it wasn't much of an improvement either. After pulling my clothes out of the drawer, I walked into my bathroom and got into shower.

Once I got out of the shower, I put on a tee shirt and a pair of sweats. I was about to read my new _Pop Star_ magazine until I heard the front door close. I put the magazine back down and sat quietly on the bed. My mother hasn't said anything yet. That's not a good start. I usually call that stage one.

Since my parents got a divorce, I've came accustom to my mother's on and off behavior. The off behavior is when she is sweet and kind to me. I always love it when she is on her off behavior. The on behavior is when she is angry at me for the little things. She would say things to me that make me feel useless and unwanted. That's when the stages began. It's hard to explain the stages but it's this thing I started doing. Sometimes it helps me realize when I need to make an exit from her before it gets really bad. It usually only get to stage three but when she gets to stage four she would be hitting me. Even though it rarely happens, it still terrifies me to know it might be coming. Yeah stage four seems to be the worst stage, but stage three is what hurts me the most.

I got off the bed and opened my door. As I was walking down the stairs I can hear my mother mumbling under her breath. She seemed to have been drinking. I call that one stage two. But wait for it, stage three better.

She stood up straight. She looked over inside the sink.

Damn the dishes. How can I forget?

"CLARE EDWARDS WHY ISN'T MY KITCHEN CLEAN?" She yelled at the top of her lungs. I ran to the sink before she can get too angry at me.

"I'm s-s-sorry mom. I had a major assignment to do, and the dishes slipped my mind." I rambled.

"That's not an excuse, if you can make time to eat my food, you can make time to wash my dishes."

"Actually mom I didn't eat yet."

"Are you smart mouthing me Clare?" Her eyes tried to focus on my face

"No mom, really I am not."

She shook her head as in disbelief.

"After all I've done for you; you can't do anything right for me. You are a worthless, lazy bitch, and no guy would ever marry you if you keep that up. That's why you father left us and ran off to marry his super young assistant." She took a sip of the beer in her hand. "Darcy was a way better daughter than you would ever be. You are nothing but a big mistake. Darcy was great and you just sat there and let her die. " She spat those words at me like I wasn't even her daughter. And THAT ladies and gentlemen, that's stage three.

I just looked up at her as I continued to wash the few dished in the sink.

I bet you thought I was going to say something back. No way, so she can beat me. I knew my mother loved me. She was just a different person, when she was drunk; she wasn't herself. I was use to the abuse. Some comments were more painful than the others. The ones about the divorce didn't bother me, but the comments about the death of my sister always hit my soft spot.

My mother rolled her eyes at me and walked upstairs to her room. I relaxed a little. I started to think about Darcy. It's like she left me here to deal with all of this. The more I thought about it the angrier I got.

I drained the water out of the sink. As I was walking up the stairs, my mother came out of her room.

"I am going out." She said as she walked past me. I didn't find that hard to believe. I just nodded my head, even though she was already out the door, and walked to my room. I walked to my chair and grabbed my coat. After I unlocked my window for later, I grabbed my cell phone off my dresser and walked out my room and out the door.

There was a breeze outside, which was kind of weird compared to the sunny August weather. I zipped my coat up and walked down the sidewalk. I haven't walked this way since my parents decided to get a divorce seven months ago.

I walked up to the gate of the cemetery and walked in. Every time I walked in I realized I was always at peace. This was strange. Cemeteries were always spooky and scary, but not since this became Darcy's permanent home. I walked around giant headstones not recognizing anyone I knew here. I was walking for three minutes when I walked up a headstone that read:

_Darcy Cassandra Edwards_

_January 6, 1990 – August 9, 2007_

"_Loving Daughter and Granddaughter, Great Big Sister and Classmate" _

"Hey Darcy" I sat down by the headstone, "It's been a year."

As I was "talking" to Darcy, I heard footsteps. I stood up and turned around.

"Shit!" A voice said from the dark figure, a short distance away. The voice sounded quiet familiar.

"Eli?" I said not sure if it was really him. The figure stops and looked my way.

"Clare? Is that you?" it said after a short pause. I didn't answer because I knew for sure it was Eli and I was still upset with him. I sat back down.

Eli walked closer to me. I turned back towards Darcy's grave.

"Clare, what are you doing here?"

"Sorry I don't want to bother you with answering."

He sat down beside me.

"Clare . . . I didn't mean to make you think you were bothering me. I wasn't thinking before I sent that last message."

"Well I think it's good to think before you do things Eli."

"I know Clare." It became silent for a moment. I didn't know what else to say to him.

"Clare, why are you here?" I looked up at him and back at Darcy's grave.

"To visit my sister"

"Her name was Darcy?"

"Yeah, she died a year ago today."

"I'm sorry Clare."

"It's not your fault." I smiled, looking back up at him. "I just miss her a lot."

"If you don't mind me asking . . . how did she die?" I took a deep breath, ready to tell Darcy's story.

"She killed herself because she didn't feel the need to live any longer."

"Wow"

"I know right, I couldn't believe it myself. She had everything; she was beautiful, smart, a wonderful boyfriend, and she had the greatest personality. Everyone that ever met her was instantly loved her."

"Since she had all of that, why did she kill herself?"

"Well, a few months before that she was on a ski trip with her boyfriend and a couple of other friends to do an early celebration of them going into their Senior Year in high school, and some man raped her." I played with my purity ring. Tears started rolling down my cheeks. "I miss her Eli." He pulled me into a hug. I cried in his shoulders.

"I know you do Clare, she was your big sister." I looked up at him.

"How can I be so angry at her?"

"What do you mean?"

"After she died, my dad started cheating and my parents got a divorce. My mother started drinking and when she drinks, she always blaming me for everything. Like tonight she told me that I was a mistake, and that I let Darcy kill herself. It's true Eli. I knew Darcy hated herself but she never talked about killing herself. I knew she was sad, but I still didn't tell my parents!" I was now crying hysterically in front of Eli Goldsworthy. How embarrassing.

He pulled me into his arms.

"Clare you are not responsible for her death. I mean like you said you didn't know she was thinking about killing herself. And as for being a mistake, your mother doesn't mean that. It was probably the beer talking. You are amazing Clare. I know I haven't known you for only a few days, but anyone can tell you are." I sat up and wiped my face. I smiled at Eli, and he smiled back.

"I can't believe I told you everything. I didn't even tell Alli about my mom." Eli's smirk crept upon his face.

"Maybe, because I mean something to you"

"Wow Eli, Smug much?"

"Always Clare, remember that"

We laughed and I looked around. I realized we were still in the cemetery and I started wondering why Eli was here. I looked at him again. He was reading Darcy's headstone.

"Eli"

He looked back up at me.

"Yeah"

"Why are you here?" His expression dropped. He turned his head, as if he was looking at something else. Something not so far from where we were sitting.

"To visit my girlfriend, Julia"

**(Eli POV)**

"Your Girlfriend?"

"Yeah. She died last year about two days ago."

"Wow Eli, I'm so sorry." A soft smile played on my lips. Clare was so beautiful.

"Well it's not your fault. It's mostly mine."

"What do you mean?" I took a deep breath. It was too soon to tell Clare, but I had to. She told me about her mother, and her sister, and I know that was hard for her to talk about.

"I killed her Clare." Clare's face became scared. So I continued quickly. "I didn't kill her, kill her Clare. I was at my parent's favorite restaurant eating to celebrate my first year in high school, when Julia came to apologize for cheating on me with an old friend. I went outside to talk to her and I started yelling at her and screaming because I was upset. I loved Julia; I couldn't believe she would cheat on me. Well I got fed up with everything and I told her to get away from me. She was begging, asking me to give her a chance, but I told her I didn't want to see her ever again. I turned around to walk back inside the restaurant when she, not watching where she stepped, backed into the street and a SUV hit her." I took another deep breath, this time a tear ran down my face. "See Clare, I killed her. "

Clare jumped and pulled me into a tight hug. It felt nice. She pulled back only inches from my face.

"It was not your fault Eli. You weren't the one driving the car, and you didn't know that that would happen."

"I am always saying things that would hurt people Clare. First with Julia, and now with you."

"Its fine, but I do want to know what that was about."

"Well I was feeling guilty about Julia. And every time I think about what had happened I feel guilty and like crap."

"It's not healthy to take your frustration out on innocent bystanders." I smiled at her and stood up.

"Well innocent bystander, can I give you a ride home to say that I am sorry?'

She looked at the hand I held out to help her stand up. She looked at her sister's grave.

"I love you Darcy." She said as she grabbed my hand and stood up. She dusted her clothes off.

I started to walk to the car. Clare walked up beside me.

"How ironic" She said to herself.

"What's that?"

"We are leaving a grave yard in a hearse."

I laughed at her comment and opened the door for her to get in. I walked around to the driver's side and got in.

"Very ironic Clare"

I started the car and drove to Clare's house. We talked about little things. It was sort of comforting. Once we got to the house, I noticed a car wasn't in the drive way. I looked over at Clare who felt relieved at the fact. She looked up at me.

"Well I guess this is my stop." She smiled slightly.

"Yeah I guess so." She opened the car door.

"Thanks Eli for the ride and for listening to me."

"It's nothing Clare, you can count on me. I'm here for you. And besides you listened to me too, so thanks."

"I guess you can count on me too." She smiled wide and closed the door. Once she opened the door she looked back me, waved and walked inside closing the door behind her.

I drove off thinking about the hour I just spent with Clare. When you look at her you would think her life was perfect and she had everything, but she was just a normal teenager.

I drove into my drive way and turned off Morty. I sat back in my seat reliving tonight in my head. Four days ago, I wasn't ready to move on. I wasn't ready to date. I walked though that park wishing I had Julia to hold on to and to be there with me. All I wanted was Julia . . .

Until I bumped into a perfect pair of blue eyes.

-**Author's Note**-

**Well hoped you liked. And btw right now (in the story) its 2008 and they are sophmores.**

**That explains why Darcy's Headstone said 2007. im not telling a lot but They will "reunite" for senior year. l0l. **

**that was a total spoiler right! l0l. sorry. **

**thanks. **


	7. Little Green Monster

**-i do not own degrassi nor the charcters :( i own this storyline :)**

***The song i was listening to was Hello, Hello by Paramore.**

**This chapter was basically something i did to keep me busy. And to add something important. (you will see later on in the story) it maybe sorta suck ish. :(**

**Sorry for typos and thanks for reviews. which reminds me: No Clare is not dying technically :) **

**I couldnt do that! **

**Well Enjoy!**

**Tonight, I Love You **

**Chapter**

**Little Green Monster**

**(Eli POV)**

I walked up to Clare before just as she was closing her locker. I didn't get a chance to talk to her in English today, since Mrs. Dawes had her "eye on us". I guess she did know we skipped yesterday. The weird thing is she didn't tell Simpson.

"So how much were you thinking about me last night?" I said once I got close up behind her. She jumped as she turned around. Once she saw it was me a smirk played on her lips.

"Hmm. I don't know Eli. I don't even remember seeing you last night. It's all a blur." She said walking away. I ran up behind her.

"Oh you saw me last night. I was probably in your dreams."

"Ha. Not likely. I slept peacefully, sorry no nightmare this time." She laughed.

"Ouch Edwards, it hurts me to know you to think of me as a nightmare." I said with my hand on my heart, laughing with her. She stops and turns towards me.

"If I told you yeah, you wouldn't leave me alone about it, right." She said her face serious at first, and then a smile crept on her face.

I bent down so my face was inches from hers.

"Right because that will tell me you like me"

"Don't flatter yourself Goldsworthy." She said and she started back walking.

"Yeah Yeah deny it now Edwards, it's only going to haunt you later." I noticed Clare started blushing. I started walking faster as I noticed Adam at the other end of the hallway. I turned around. "Sit with me at lunch?"

"Sure" She said and turned to walk towards Alli's locker.

I walked up to Adam who was looking up at a girl a few feet away.

"Dude, drool much?" He looked my way.

"Man she's beautiful. I can't help but to drool." I turned to take a good look at the girl he was drooling at.

"Ah Fiona Coyne; beautiful, Rich, and so hard to get" Adam let out a sigh.

"I know man, that's the hard part of it all." We started walking to the Cafeteria.

"You got it bad man."

"I know, I'm just like you bro." he said elbowing me lightly in the arm.

"What does that mean?"

"Oh you know, everyone's talking about your little rescue mission and getaway yesterday for Clare Edwards."

"Clare's a good friend. They need to just mind their own business." I said getting defensive.

"Whoa man, I didn't say I said so." I sighed.

"I know dude." We sat down at our table towards the back.

"Hey what happened after you guys left by the way?"

I started telling Adam about yesterday, from the conversation in the car to me dropping her off after going to see Julia. I left out Clare's personal things about her mom. He didn't need to know all her business right.

"Dude, some day you had."

"I know man."

"You told her about Julia, when you didn't have to." He said raising his eyebrows.

"What are you getting at Adam?"

"Man you like her." I rubbed my hand across my face. He wouldn't leave it alone. I looked around to see if she was coming yet.

"Yes man I think I'm falling for Clare Edwards."

**(Clare POV)**

"Alli it wasn't a big deal."

"Yes it was Clare. He told you about his dead girlfriend, after only meeting you four days ago, and saving your behind from kicking Jenna's butt. He likes you Clare-Bear."

"Alli, that's him just being a good friend."

"Yeah that's him just in "Like" with you." I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror.

"He couldn't Alli. All the other girls he could like and he chose me, Ugly Clare Edwards." She looked at me in disbelief.

"Clare you are beautiful, smart, and funny. Of course he would choose you."

"Not beautiful to keep KC interested enough not to cheat on me."

"Sorry Clare, but KC is a bastard. And bastards like him don't deserve someone like you." She hugged me.

"And as for Jenna, She's a little whore who can't catch a clue." Alli said. I gasped and she shrugged her shoulders.

"It's true Clare and you know it. Oh I forgot, Saint Clare wouldn't dare say something like that."

"I am a saint because I am a virgin. Not because I do know the truth."

"No you are a saint because you are also too nice for people who didn't deserve it."

"Well not to worry, I won't be nice to her anymore."

"That a girl Clare, and besides the next time she approaches you for a fight, I will give her one."

I laughed at my crazy bestfriend

"Thanks Alli."

"Anytime Clare, you are my best friend." We walked out the bathroom to go to the cafeteria.

"I sort of told Eli I would sit with him at lunch if that's okay?"

"Oh yeah, that's fine because I sort of told Drew we would sit with him."

"You and Drew?"

"Yeah, me and Drew, we've been talking on the phone these past two nights, and conversation has been great. He invited me to sit with him at lunch today."

"That's cool Alli."

"I know, now all we have to do is get you and Eli Goldsworthy together and all will be fine."

"Alli"

"Hey, don't shoot me because you are in "like" with him too."

I looked around the lunchroom, and spotted Eli and Adam sitting at the back of the cafeteria talking. Adam looked as if he just made Eli confess to something big.

"See you Alli" I said before walking towards Eli's table. As I started walking, I could feel a pair of eyes watching me. I looked back at Alli who were focused on her conversation with Drew. I shrugged it off sitting down at the table.

"So glad you can make it Edwards." Eli said giving me his signature smirk.

"Well it's the least I can do." I smiled back. I looked at Adam, who was quietly eating his lunch. How strange, because he was just in an interesting conversation with Eli. "Hi Adam. Enjoying your lunch?"

"Oh hi Clare." He looked over at Eli slightly smiling. Eli gave him a death glare and turned his attention back towards me.

"So I see Alli is with Drew?"

"Yeah they've became close, I think"

"What? Are you scared of losing your best bud?"

"No I am not."

"And why is that?"

"Because I have you . . . and Adam of course" Adam looked back up.

"Of course Clare you have me AND Eli." He said.

"Don't listen to him Clare" Eli shot another death glare at Adam and he looked back at me. "But he is right, you can always hang with us."

Just as we were talking a girl walked u to our table smiling at Eli. I knew her. Her name was Anya MacPherson. She was captain of the Spirit Squad and Sav's, Alli's big brother, ex girlfriend.

"Uh, hey Anya"

How did he know her?

"So I was wondering would you like to meet up and talk about out our History project Saturday."

"Um I can't do it on Saturday. Rain check?"

"Sure, here's my number. Call me anytime." She handed Eli her number before walking off. Eli was staring at the number like it was something foreign. I could help but feel that a pair of eyes was on my back. I knew it wasn't Anya because I could see her in front of me. I looked around the room and noticed KC staring at me. He gave me a weird smile and turned his attention back on his friends. I looked back at Eli who was talking to Adam with his eyes.

I thought about what just happened with Anya. That was rude of her. She didn't know if Eli and I was a couple. She just cared about getting him alone. She was beautiful and any guy would be interested in her and as I about it, a weird feeling rose in my cheeks.

-**Author's Note**-

**I told you sorta suck ish.**

**I named this chapter "little green monster" because thats what some people call the weird feeling Clare is feeling. l0l. **

**Well i will be writing another chapter tonight because, well, because i am super bored. **

**Thanks && review if you please. I love your reviews.**


	8. For The Love of Friendship

**-ugh. i do not own degrassi or their character. there! are you happy?**

**hey i do own this story. HA! :)**

**-The songs i was listening to were Do it Like A Dude by Jessie J and Shake by Jesse McCartney**

***okay i know i promised a chapter the other day but i fell asleep after i ate :) SO SO SORRY!**

**So here is the Eli chapter.**

**please excuse my typos!**

**&& Please Enjoy and review. thanks a lot!**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 8**

**For the Love of Friendship**

**(Eli POV)**

"Eli Baby, let's go to the mall after school." Anya said rubbing her hands through my hair.

It's been three months since Anya had given me her number and asked me out. I decided that our project needed to get done, so I decided to take her up on her offer and go out with her. The way we got together was so unexpected that it even through me off. One minute Clare was the only one on my mind, and now I am with Anya. Anya is fun to be around when it's just us two. She's the attention grabber, the opposite of who I am, but we make it work.

"Anya, I have detention remember, for skipping Science. We can't go tonight." I said closing my locker.

"But baby, Drew's celebration party is tomorrow night. We need to look our best."

"I was just going to wear black. That's not hard to find in my closet." Anya rolled her eyes and started walking away. I stood at my locker, waiting for her to turn back around and come back. I leaned back on my locker when Anya turned around and walked back my way.

"Black isn't the only color Eli." She said slightly turning her nose up.

"Black is the color I prefer; sometimes gray can execute." She started to poke her lips out slightly, and I knew it was time for her to start whining. "If you be ready after my detention . . ."

"Thanks Eli, I will be ready. Just pick me up at home. See you later baby." She kissed my lips slightly and walked out the door.

I shook my head and started down the hallway for detention. I wouldn't be in detention if Anya didn't convince me to skip Science to make out in the Boiler Room. I shook the thought out of my head. I was use to being in detention at my old school for skipping. One week detention for skipping one day wasn't really necessary. Lucky for me, this is my last day.

As I walking down the hallway I noticed Clare walking out of the Library. She looked determined. I started feeling bad for not talking to her much and hanging with Anya all the time, but she had told me she was okay with Adam. As she walked out her book bag had fallen and all her papers fell out of her bag. She started mumbling under her breath. I smiled at the sight. I walked over to give her a hand.

"You know its okay to zip the book bag so your stuff won't fall out." I laughed, bending down to help her. She looked up as if I startled her, then her facial expression changed. That's weird.

"I got it Eli" She said picking up the papers more quickly now. I stood up with some of her papers in my hand. She stood up and looked at me. I noticed she had a small scar under her right eye.

"What happened to your eye?" I asked reaching up to touch it. She grabbed her papers and quickly walked away. I ran to catch up with her. I still had fifteen minutes before detention officially started so I was okay. I ran out in front of her. "Clare what's wrong?"

"Nothing you need to worry yourself over." She tried to walk around me, but I blocked her way.

"We are still friends Clare."

"Are we Eli, are we really friends?"

"Yes Clare we are."

"Well some friend you have been."

"What does that mean?" She gave me an incredulous look.

"Eli, I have to leave." She tried to walk around me again but I wasn't giving up.

"Clare, come on, don't be like this"

"Don't be like what Eli?"

"Don't ignore me."

"Don't ignore you? Are you serious right now, or am I being pranked?" She looked around to see if anyone in the hallway.

"Clare, no one else is in the hallway. Now tell me what happened." She folded her arms.

"Nothing"

"Are you okay, is everything okay at home?"

"Yes"

"How did you get the scar?"

"No reason"

My frustration was rising. Clare was being unfair. I thought we were still friends.

"Clare, why won't you talk to me? I'm trying to be a good friend to you and all you are not helping." Clare started laughing as if what I said was a joke. Then her face became serious, so serious it was frightening.

"You are the last person on earth I would consider a good friend. When I needed you to be there for me you blew me off every time. So why would you want to be here for me now? This act you are trying to pull is not fooling me. You might got Adam fooled, but I'm a lot harder. You only talk to Adam when you need something, or you are bored because Anya has better things to do!"

"That's not true, Clare, and you know it."

"I know what Eli? You know it's true. When Anya is not using you to get what she wants, she dumps you on Adam. And Adam, being the great friend he is, still has your back."

"I do things for Anya because I really like her" Clare rolled her eyes, "and besides Adam understands that I have a girlfriend now. So why are you worried about it?"

"Oh Elijah, don't flatter yourself. I have bigger worries than you and your girlfriend."

"Is that it Clare? Are you jealous?" Clare laughed again. She was really making my blood boil.

"Jealous?" She said catching her breath. Then suddenly the laughing stopped. "Why would I be jealous over that joke of a relationship?"

"Says someone who can't keep a boyfriend" Clare's face dropped. I didn't mean to say that but she had made me mad. Right then I finally saw the hurt in her eyes she's been holding back. She collected her face, and the expression was emotionless.

"Clare" I started to apologize but she held her hand up.

"You know what Elijah. I hope you and Anya are happy with each other. She is a wannabe and you are an asshole." I stood there with a stupid look on my face.

Just as I was about to respond I hear Adam's name calling for Clare. She looks around me to see Adam walking into sight. He looked at me, then back at Clare. His face became curious.

"Are you okay Clare?" She looked back at me. Then back at him.

"Yeah I was just handling a problem, but problem solved."

"Are you ready to go?" He looked back at me confused this time. Why haven't he said anything to me yet.

"Yeah, I've been ready." She walked past me, and turned around. "I hope she loves you." She said before walking off. She walked u to Adam and slightly nudged him to start walking. He looked back at me before walking off behind Clare. I just stood there in the hallway with a foolish look on my face. 'What just happened?'

As I walked into detention my mind was on Clare. All I could think about was what she meant by 'when I needed you, you blew me off'.

I sat down at in a desk, still searching. Then it hit me. We don't talk in English, we don't IM on Skype, and we haven't hung out since Anya came along. Of course she's mad at me. I blew her off.

_Clare walked up to me in the cafeteria, where I was waiting for Anya and her friends to come out of the bathroom. She tapped my shoulder. I turned around to see what she wanted._

"_Eli, why didn't you answer the phone last night?"_

"_I was busy with Anya." _

"_You could've answered and told me that."_

"_Anya kept me busy." I said with a smirk. _

"_Gross Eli" She didn't understand._

"_Is that it Clare."_

"_You don't even want to know what I needed."_

"_Sure, what was it." I said looking at the door getting impatient. _

"_I needed a ride home from visiting Darcy because it started raining, and I was getting soaked. So I ran inside the DOT to call you from my cell, but instead I ran into the **Black Veil Brides **who were in Canada on tour, how cool and they were eating and drinking coffee"_

"_That's good Clare but Anya and Holly J is back and this is sort of their table"_

"_Oh well can I at least finished?"_

"_No you can't nerd." Anya said sitting next to me. _

"_Anya" _

"_Sorry baby" She said kissing me aggressively on my lips in front of Clare. _

"Okay detention is over early today you can go home." Simpson said standing up from his desk.

I got up and walked outside to Morty. I unlocked the door and got in. I can't believe I blew Clare off like that, and that wasn't the first time. It couldn't have been because that was the last day she talked to me.

My mind wondered back three months ago, two weeks after Anya and I started dating. The last time Clare and I was sitting in Morty.

"_You have a girlfriend Eli, you are gonna forget about Adam and I now."_

"_No I won't Clare."_

"_Sure you won't"_

"_Trust me Clare I won't blow you and Adam off for some girl." I gave her a real smile._

"_Okay Eli, I believe you."_

_-_**Author's Note**_-_

**So how did you like it. **

**Sorry i made Eli look like a douche. but there are reasons for these things man! :)**

**Oh and So Sorry if i made Anya sound bad too.**

**Actually i love Anya! but i just wanted to use her. **

**I will Update Wednesday and Thursday because i will be busy with the Air Force (yay no skool), and i know i will be bored so I will write.**

**Thanks!**


	9. Part 1:The Party

**-i do not own degrassi. or the main charcters. Whippee :|**

**-i do own the storyline so kool.**

**-if it matters i am sorry i havent been updating. Senior year is starting to become very busy for me in school. **

**the song filling my ears while writing this chapter was How Do Yo Sleep by Jesse McCartney. **

***please enjoy. **

**oh && ignore my stupid obvious typos! :) **

**you guys are the best please keep reviewing!**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 9 **

**Part 1: The Party  
**

**(Clare POV)**

"He had the audacityto say I was jealous of him and Anya. Can you believe it Alli? We went from talking and IM every night to him ignoring me completely. I was just concerned about my friend but he called me jealous." I shook my head and looked over at Alli who was still rambling through my closet to find me something to wear to Drew's party tonight. She looked up from my clothes so she can see my face.

"Clare do not totally kill me for asking this, but are you jealous?"

"NO" I answered too fast. She nodded her head as if getting her answer. "I just don't think she's right for him. She's a just another rich girl, an original Holly J wannabe."

"I agree with you but if Eli is happy with the relationship, then who are you to say what's right for him?"

I sighed knowing that Alli was right. It wasn't my place to say who is right for Eli. Maybe it was jealousy that I was feeling. I can't admit this out loud; it might end in a disaster on my behalf. Alli interrupted my thinking.

"UGH" She exhaled loudly.

"What is it Alli?"

"Nothing in here is what I am going for."

"What do you mean? My clothes aren't that bad."

"No they are pretty good, but I was looking for sexy."

"Sexy?"

"Yes sexy. Clare, even though I think whatever Eli's relationship is with Anya is none of our business, he was still a jerk for what he said about that can't keep a boyfriend thing, so we are going to show him how to keep his mouth shut."

I knew that I didn't really own any clothes that showed my "sexy" side, so we were pretty screwed. Right when I was about to tell Alli to not worry about it an idea came to mind.

"Well, I can fit some of Darcy's dresses now." Alli's face beamed.

"GREAT" She grabbed my hand and dragged me off my bed. We walked of my room door into the hallway.

"Wait" I whispered before Alli opened Darcy's door. I had to prepare myself before I went in. Every time I went in her room I get emotional, I wanted to be strong tonight. Alli squeezed my hand.

"Ready?"

I nodded my head. She nodded her head in response and turned the knob.

Once we walked in, I inhaled the smell. It smelt smog, but it still had Darcy's scent. Alli looked back at me so I collected my thoughts and walked over to her closet. Alli came up behind me and started looking through her clothes.

I started walking around the room looking at Darcy's awards and pictures that were still on her wall. As I was about to walk back over to Alli, my eyes ran across a picture of me, Darcy, Dad, and Mom. Darcy was about ten and I was about six maybe. Our family looked sincerely happy. My mother was wearing that smiled I haven't seen since Darcy's death.

"It's perfect" I looked up at Alli and noticed she was holding up a black, short halter dress. I knew that dress. It was Darcy's favorite. I nodded my head in agreement and we walked out the room to get ready for the party.

**(8:45 Drew's Party)**

I rubbed my hands across the dress I was wearing. It fit perfect, so Alli was pretty satisfied. She did my make-up, and my hair, which was curly and pinned up on one side, perfectly. I had to admit it, not to sound cocky or anything, but I looked beautiful. I felt beautiful. I opened the door and walked out proudly as loud techno music filled my ears.

**(Eli POV)**

I knocked on the door and waited for someone to answer. Adam opened the door. He looked at Anya, then at me. 'What was his problem?'

"Chairs in the living room" He said before walking off leaving us at the door.

"Way to be rude" Anya said before walking in. I walked in behind her. Lots of people were already there eating, talking, and dancing uncontrollably. The party was a success I must admit.

"Let's go over there by Holly J and Chantey." She said pulling my arm.

Once we made our way through the crowd I saw Holly J and Declan Coyne, Fiona Coyne's twin brother, hugged up, along with KC and Jenna, Bianca and Owen, and Drew and Alli. When I looked at Alli she gave me that same look Adam gave me earlier. I guess she talked to Clare. The thought of Clare had me searching the room for her. I just need to see her, to see if she was okay of course.

As I was searching the room for Clare I noticed Adam walk into the kitchen. I leaned over to Anya's ear.

"Baby, I will be back. I'm about to talk to Adam."

"Hurry back" She said as I was walking off.

As I walked into the kitchen, I hear Adam cursing under his breath.

"What am I his fucking maid?" He said putting cocktail wieners on a tray.

"I think you should quit." I said trying to lighten his mood. He looked up at me and glared. Adam was obviously mad at me too. "Adam, man, what's up?" He rolled his eyes.

"What do you mean Eli?"

"The look you gave me at the door and you just did it again. What did I do to you?" He turned away, and looked back at me. We were awkwardly silent for about 30 seconds before Adam started back talking.

"Why did you have to say that to Clare?" I was confused at first then the conversation, well argument, I had with Clare quickly replayed in my mind. I sighed.

"Which part?"

"The part about how she can't keep a boyfriend. You know that really hurt her to hear you say that."

"I tried to apologize Adam, she wouldn't let me."

"Why say it in the first place Eli?

"I was mad okay."

"Okay, so it's okay to hurt people when YOU are mad?

"I didn't mean it that way"

"So what did you mean? You are confusing me."

"She was saying shit to make me mad Adam."

"So she says how she thinks your relationship is a joke, and you hit her with a low blow? I understand how you operate now."

"So you wouldn't get mad at something like that?" Adam was starting to piss me off.

"Yes I would be mad but I wouldn't low blow a friend, knowing that that's a soft subject for her. The Eli I met this summer didn't hold much back but damn I didn't know he was ruthless and heartless too." He grabbed the tray and sat it on the food table. "You know its one thing to abandon a true friend and blow them off for your girlfriend, but it's also another if you don't care. I took the constant cancelation of guy's night, and the sudden ignoring for these months but only because I felt you weren't doing it purposely; but to know you really didn't care, that showed real friendship."

I looked at Adam finally venting how he felt about the whole situation. I didn't realize how much I hurt my best friend. Adam has been putting up with my bullshit and I haven't even been a friend back to him.

"Adam" He gave me a small smile, but I knew he was still mad.

"Don't worry about it Eli. I understand."

"No I don't think you do. Okay, I know I messed up. Clare helped me realized that I did. All I cared about was being with Anya, sex, and getting what I want. Man I apologize for acting an ass. I mean I can't take anything back all I can do is say I'm sorry and hope you forgive me." Adam looked at me this time for what seemed like minutes. Then he rubbed his hand across his face.

"I can't believe I'm going say this" he looked back at me "As long as you help take these trays to that table, I might be able to try that forgive you thing." Adam and I fist bumped and I picked up the trays.

I was sitting my tray on the table when I heard Clare's giggle. I knew it anywhere. I looked around the room and there she was. She had on this sexy black dress that hugged her hips perfectly. Her hair was the curliest I've ever seen it. I couldn't take my eyes off her. She was the most beautiful person in the room.

I knew I was staring because I couldn't take my eyes off of her. Her perfect blue eyes started roaming the room until they landed on me. I could see the mixed emotions in her eyes before she turned her gaze back on the person she was talking to. Adam came up behind me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Staring at her won't help"

"She hates me"

"She doesn't hate you; she's just upset with you right now."

"How can I get my friend back?"

"Only you would know dude, but in the mean time I think Miss Coyne will be looking for me in a minute."

"Ya dude, go have fun"

"I plan to" he looked back at me and patted my shoulder "Hey do the right thing man"

I watched him walk over to where Fiona was sitting and kiss her cheeks, and then I walked back over to where I left Anya.

Once I made it over there Anya wasn't sitting where I'd left her, she wasn't there. I looked over at Holly J who were making out with Declan on the recliner. I needed to ask someone where Anya was. Then I noticed Bianca and Owen watching me so decided to ask them instead.

"Hey, do you guys know where Anya went?"

Bianca looked at Owen then back at me.

"Are we supposed to be your girlfriend's keeper?"

"Whatever" I walked away from them before my temper gets the best of me.

"She said something about the bathroom!" Bianca called after me. I didn't bother to turn around and say thanks because I was already far enough away.

As I was walking down the hallway, I heard a familiar voice coming from Drew's room. I knew it was Anya's but who exactly was she talking to; the better question is what was she doing?

I opened the door to see Anya and Sav making out on Sav's bed.

"ANYA?" I yelled walking futher in the room. Anya jumped off of the bed and ran towards me.

"Eli it's not what it looks like"

**-Author's Note-**

**did you enjoy? if so tell me what you liked about it!**

**:) thx.**


	10. Part 2: The Party

**i do not own degrassi or the main charcters. :| but i do own this storyline! :)**

**The songs in my ear while typing this chapter are: **

**Falling in Love by Jesse McCartney (i think im getting obsessed with Jesse now), **

**Here You Me by Jimmy Eat World, **

**We R Who We R by Ke$ha.**

**please excuse my typos. and PLEASE ENJOY!**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 10**

**Part 2: The Party **

**(Eli POV)**

"Eli it's not what it looks like"

"What do you mean it's not what it looks like? You are making out with Sav. Last time I checked YOU ARE MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND!" Anya tried to put her hand on my face but I pushed her away from me.

"We didn't mean for this to happen Eli."

"Okay Anya, why don't you tell me how you two end up in this room, on the bed, two seconds away from fucking each other brains out."

"Eli Man, we didn't do this on purpose." Sav said, but who gives a fuck about what he says. Not I.

"Sav stay out of it because I am about 'two second away' from KICKING YOUR ASS!"

"I don't want fight you man, but if I have to. . ." Sav started walking towards me, so I took a couple steps up towards Sav. Anya stepped in between us; my guess was to stop us. I didn't see the point though. I was beyond pissed.

"Boys cut it out." She looked at me. "Can I explain?"

"You have about a good thirty seconds to start before I start fucking up everyone's night Anya." Anya grabbed my hand and tried to look me in the eyes. I tried to give her the worst look I could give.

"Eli, Sav had asked me to go somewhere and talk to him, so I did. We got to talking about our past and we started talking about our feelings for each other. One thing lead to another and we started kissing. I was never intending to make out with Sav tonight. It just happened." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Was she telling me she still loved this rocker wannabe?

"What feelings you shared Anya?" Her eyes started to wander. I knew Anya well, and I knew that that look was never lead to a good thing.

"Eli, you are such a wonderful guy, and you were a great boyfriend, that I forgot the real reason to why I started dating you."

"And what was that Anya" This night did not turn out the way I expected it.

"I got with you because I knew that if I got with the new, mysterious, sexy guy everyone was talking about then I would make Sav jealous and regret breaking up with me." Sav came up behind Anya and wrapped his arm around her. "Eli, I still love him."

And there you have. This was officially, so far, the second worst night of my life.

**(Clare POV)**

I looked around to see if anyone else was out here except for me. I guess I'm not. Waiting for Alli to get finish with Drew was exhausting. I guess it's because I was bored and lonely. Well, I was use to the lonely part. I would've stayed inside but I didn't want to interrupt Adam and Fiona's little make-out session. The breeze started to brush up against my legs. I never realized it's very cold at three o'clock in the morning.

As I was sitting on one of Adam's lawn chairs, I hear someone coming from the back yard. I didn't want to freak because it might be something harmless, and everyone would be annoyed if I interrupted them, and I didn't want to be calm just in case it was a rapist. God, how much I didn't want to be in Darcy's shoes right now.

So I stood up and grabbed on the nearest thing by me, a lawn gnome. As I started to point to gnome towards the footsteps I heard laughter, and then Eli walking out of the dark. Great, now I wish it was a rapist. Okay, not really.

"Really Clare, is that your BIG weapon, a gnome?" He said still laughing at me. I sat the gnome down and sat back in my chair.

"Whatever, Eli. I could've did damage you know. I can throw pretty hard." He came over to where I was sitting and sat in a chair besides me.

"Sure you can Clare. So why haven't you left yet?"

"None of you business actually" I saw his face slightly drop, it was like he was already sad about something. I decided to cut him some slack. "If you must know, I am waiting on Alli to finish whatever she is doing with Drew so we can go home."

"Okay that's cool, I guess"

"Wait, why are you still here? Shouldn't you be somewhere doing something with Anya?"

"No, she's somewhere doing something with Sav." Wow, I have a feeling someone's night was pretty crappy.

"What happened" I mean it couldn't hurt asking right.

"Well, to make a long story short I caught Anya making out with Sav, come to find out she was still in love with him, and they road off together."He looked at me and gave me a half smile.

"Eli, I will say that I am sorry that this happened to you, but to be honest, I don't feel sorry for you."

"Clare, I understand. It's like, I'm upset that I was cheated on twice in less than two years, but I am not upset with me and Anya being over. After I talked to you yesterday, I couldn't stop thinking, 'Why was I with Anya?' Clare, I know I let my friendship with you go down the drain, but I am willing to do whatever to get us back to being friends again."

I didn't know what to say him. After his apology, I wanted to forgive him, and forget what happened, but I couldn't. And with us being friends again, it will be hard to keep how I feel about him under control.

"Eli, I don't know it will be hard."

"Please, just give me a chance to be your friend Clare." Then again, maybe being friends will let me know my true feelings for Eli. By the way he did say he would do anything.

"Okay Eli, I will forgive you under one condition." He gave me a weird look.

"Okay" he stretched the word "What is it?"

"You have to drive me where ever, whenever I need a ride." He gave me a wide smile.

"I'll do it." We hugged. Once we pulled away I realized I didn't see Morty. So how was he getting home?

"Speaking of rides, where is Morty?"

"Well, Morty is sick"

"Sick, how is Morty sick?"

"This morning I was trying to turn Morty on and he wouldn't even make a sound." He said with that smirk on his face. The smirk I missed seeing.

"Okay we are officially weird Elijah." He put his hand on his chest.

"Ouch Edwards, when I thought we were turning back normal. . ."

"Oh Eli, we were never normal." Eli started laughing and I laughed with him.

As we were laughing the door opened and came outside with Drew behind her, finally. I stood up from my chair and smooth my dress. Eli stood up as well. Alli looked at Eli then back at me.

"Are you ready to go?" She asked.

"Yeah" I looked back over at Eli "It was nice talking to you again Eli"

"Me too Clare"

Alli and I started walking down the stairs. She came close to me and whispered in my ear.

"My plan worked" And walked ahead to her car. We were lucky that Alli's parents brought her a car for her 16th birthday. What's fun having a car when you can only drive it one day out of a week until she turn 17.

I giggled to myself and turned around to see Eli getting in a black Mercedes. I guessed it was his mom. He looked up at me and smile. I smiled back. He got in and drove away as I got in and put on my seat belt. When I finished I noticed Alli looking at me.

"What?" I asked.

"So I guess you had a good night." I looked ahead as she turned the car on.

"It was great"

(Eli POV)

I walked inside the house and put Cece's keys back on the key hook. I was ready to get in bed and go to sleep. I had a long night. As I walked into the kitchen to grab a Dr. Pepper out of the refrigerator I noticed Cece was up. She had on her night clothes.

"Hey Cece, couldn't sleep?" She looked up from her crossword puzzle.

"Nope, I went to sleep early and I got hungry so I got up and came in here to get something to eat. Now that I've eaten I can't sleep. This sucks baby boy." I laughed at my mom and finished my Dr. Pepper. "How was your night Eli?"

I thought about everything that had happened. I thought about Adam. I thought about Anya and Sav. I knew that once I get back to school people was going to be talking about it but it really didn't matter. I had Adam and Clare again. Then I thought about Clare and the way she smiled back at me.

"Well Cece, it was great"

-**Author's Note**-

**So you likey? **

**You guys i couldn't make Eli fight Sav. But i wanted him to.**

**So that's it he made back up with Clare and Adam. **

**Lets see will they start dating!**

**Oh && btw i havent forgotten about the scar thing. It will be mentioned. later. ;)**

**Drama Awaits. **

**thanks for reviewing ily :)**

**p.s. I AM PATIENTLY WAITING BUT DEGRASSI NEEDS TO HURRY UP AND COME BACK ON! UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!**

**:)**


	11. It's Like A Force of Nature

**-disclaimer: i dont own degrassi :(**

**i am so so so so sorry i havent been updating but between Spanish II, Anatomy, & The Air Force my schedule has been busy. **

**And another downside, I've had a horrible case of Writer's Block (UGH!)**

**& i've been getting other ideas for other shows like Victorious and Sonny With A Chance. . .**

**(I know i'm a traitor. l0l. i feel bad.)**

**but if you can please forgive me & review**

**-&& excuse my typos **

**-thanks**

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 11**

**It's Like a Force of Nature**

**(Eli POV)**

"_Did you hear?"_

"_I heard he got dumped"_

"_Anya cheated on him with Sav"_

"_Did you see Sav and Anya together?"_

"_Is he single now?"_

"_I will like to date him"_

"_He couldn't handle Anya. She needed a guy like me"_

I had to listen to that for about three weeks after Anya and I break-up. I mean really is that what's all to talk about at Degrassi? But hey, I knew it would be like that. I just really hope Anya is very happy and satisfied for doing what she did. I am still confused. Should I hold a grudge against her or should I just let it all go?

On the bright side of all of this, I got my old friends back. Adam acts as if I never left the group at all. And as for Clare, my feelings can rushing back like a force, a force I couldn't stop. She's slowly forgiving me and I understand, but I haven't given up. I've realized things about Clare that I didn't before, and that scar on her face will not leave my mind. It's gradually going away but I can still see it as much as I know she still can.

I was sitting in front of my locker reading a comic I brought with Adam when he came and sat down beside me.

"You haven't finished yet?"

"No dude I've been busy doing extra credit."

"Finished"

"Are you serious?"

"Finished before lunch"

"Well don't tell it I have a couple of pages left."

"Greatest comic ever"

"I agree"

We were talking about comics when Clare came and sat down beside me. She was talking to us about how much she hated her new science partner when my eyes fell on her scare.

"You don't have to keep staring at it" She said and looked down.

"Sorry Clare, but I've been thinking about it. You never told me what happened." I said reaching to touch it.

"It's nothing Eli"

"But Clare, it doesn't look like it was nothing."

"Eli can you just leave it alone for right now"

I looked over to Adam who put his head down; my guess is that he knew what had happened.

"Okay Clare"

The rest of the day went by as a blur. Why couldn't I get my mind off of her scar? Was it me being pushy and nosey or was it me being worried for a friend? Ugh, when did my life become so difficult?

I had a plan to get her to tell me without looking pushy. I didn't know how well it will work, but I hope it does.

As I was walking to Morty I see Clare waiting for me to give her a ride home like I've been doing for the past weeks. Her autumn hair and blue eyes shined in the December sun. She was beyond beautiful.

"Took you long enough" She said as I approached her and Morty "I was about to hotwire Morty and go on a joy ride." She said laughing as she got in.

"Saint Clare knows how to hotwire a car?"

"There's a lot about Saint Clare you don't know about Goldsworthy" She said giving me a smirk. I laughed.

"Sure Clare"

We were out of the school's parking lot and riding silently until Clare noticed we wasn't going the direction that led to her house.

"Uh Eli, where are you taking me?"

"Just ride Clare"

"Seriously Eli. Where are you taking me?" I sighed.

"To the Park"

"What for? We should be going to my house."

"We will after the park"

"Eli . . ."

"Clare just live a little, enjoy the ride"

"Whatever Eli"

Once we go to the park, I turned off the car and got out. Clare walked up behind me.

"It's Cold Eli" She said pulling her coat closer to her.

"Not much" I said smiling down at her.

"If I freeze . . ."

"You won't but just in case, do you want me to put my arms around you?"

"I'm fine" She said softly. I laughed at the faces she was making and pointed to a table that was in the sun. "Sure"

"So how was your day?" I asked once we sat down.

"That's why you brought me here Elijah?"

"Clare"

"Fine Eli. How was your day?"

"It was long I guess because I was so eager to bring you here."

"Well I will like to know the reason"

"Just to catch up Clare"

"Catch up. . ."

"Yep, to catch up"

"Well let's . . . catch up" She said looking around. I knew the real reason why I brought her here, but I didn't just want to say it out loud and look too pushy but the wait was getting irritating. So what the heck might as well just spit it out, right?

"When I was about nine, I was had got this brand new bike for Christmas. I was so happy that I was so eager to ride it. My parents had brought me knee pads and elbow pads and a helmet, but me thinking I was a big kid didn't think I needed the knee and elbow pads so when Cece and Bullfrog wasn't looking . . ."

"Really Eli?" Clare said interrupting my story. She started laughing.

"Clare let me finish. So where was I . . . oh yeah, so when they weren't looking . . ."

"Eli" Clare said putting her hand over my mouth.

"Yes" I muffled under her palm.

"You really want to know how I got this scar don't you." She said removing her hand.

"Sort of"

She let out a big sigh. "Well. . ."

**(Clare POV)**

"One night my mom came home angry at her boss and drunk from God only knows how many beers. She saying something about money was cut from her check and that her boss was a con artist. Well, she needed to take her anger out on something so she came home throwing pictures, breaking glass, and knocking things over. Once she realized she was making such a huge mess, she burst inside my room where I was hiding, making me go down stairs and clean up the mess. I was walking towards the kitchen to grab the broom, when she pushed me face first into the counter top, yelling I was moving too slow and being disobedient."

I looked up at Eli's face and he had that look on his face that I hated seeing, apologetic. I hated when other people felt sorry for me. So I looked away and finished my story.

"Once she realized I was bleeding, she told me to get out of her face, and that I disgust her. So I ran out the door and kept running until I made it to Darcy's grave. I sat there and cried until it started raining. I then got up and ran to the nearest place open. Which was the DOT I ran inside to call you and ask you to pick me up but once I cleaned off my face, with its fresh wound, and pulled out my phone to call you but I was then I laid eyes on the Black Veil Brides.

"Once I had got their autograph, I tried calling you but you didn't answer, so I called Adam and we sat with Black Veil Brides until they had to leave. Adam then took me home. And that's what happened. Now you can stop obsessing." I smiled but Eli didn't return the smile.

"I don't remember seeing the scar."He said. His voice sounded far away.

"What?"

"That day when you came up to me talking about BVB, I don't remember seeing a scar." Then it hit me. The last day he blew me off. The kiss he and Anya shared in front of me. The reason I was furious with him for those months.

"It was there"

"Why didn't I see it? I was looking right at you." He asked now looking directly at me, his emerald eyes burning a hole through my eyes.

"Maybe you were looking, but you weren't really seeing. And plus you were into Anya."

"But Clare"

"Eli that's the past, things happen. And maybe whatever happened between you and Anya, and me and my mom, happened for a life lesson. No need to look back and feel sorry. I'm fine.

"I should've been there for you when you called. I'm a crappy friend."

"It's fine, really. I've moved on." Eli gave me a smile I've never seen from him before.

We talked for about an hour about music and other things we had in common until I realized I needed to get home before my mom did.

"Uh Eli, it's not that I am not having fun or anything, but it's really getting late and my mom is getting off work, so I have to go."

"Sure let's go"

We got into Morty and rode in silence. Not and uncomfortable silence, but a calming, happy silence. It gave me a chance to soak up my day before I enter my night world.

Eli stopped the car in front of my house. I looked in the drive way and my mom wasn't home yet which was good.

"Thanks for today. It gave me a chance to do something different after school for once in a while." I said before getting out of Morty.

"You're welcome Clare. I had fun."

"Me too. Well, Bye"

"Bye. Good night"

"Keep your fingers crossed." I said as I got out and walked up the stairs. I turned around and waved at Eli as he pulled off.

I turned around, held my breath, and walked into the house.

**-Author's Note-**

**It's not my best but this was my second time writing this chapter. so BLAH!**

**Better & longer chapters to come **

**Sailor's Honor. l0l.**

**I will try to update ASAP! **

**Sorry Again!**

**:)**


	12. The PastIt Haunts You

**Disclaimer: I donot own Degrassi but this is my story line.**

**I Am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Sorry That I Havent Wrote Anything In A LONG Time. I Was Recently In The Air Force Bootcamp. So Of Course I Didnt Have The Time. I Cant Promise To Add Another Chapter Soon Because I Leave for College Next Week :) But I AM Going To Do The Best I Can. Thats My Word.**

**The Songs I Was Listening To Was Open Road (I Love Her) by Chris Brown && Watch N' Learn by Rihanna.**

**PLEASE Enjoy. && Excuse My Typos. **

**Tonight, I Love You**

**Chapter 12**

**The Past..It Haunts You**

**(Clare POV)**

For some odd reason, I couldn't get Eli out of mind. Every since I opened the door and walked inside my dark, but peaceful home. All the feelings I had for him came rushing back. Who would've thought he would go through all that trouble just to ask me about a scar. I guess it was a sweet gesture, I mean it was good spending time like that after school, so yes I'm happy it happened.

After washing the dirty dishes in the sink, I walked to my room & logged onto my Skype. I walked to my bed, picked up a magazine and waited for someone to IM me.

***Bing* **

I smiled and looked up from the magazine to see if it was Eli who binged me.

_**Charles_Edwards Wants To Video Chat**_

I stared at the screen couldn't believe, didn't want to believe that he found my Skype page.

_**Charles_Edwards** : Clare Please Chat With Me. _

_**Charles_Edwards** : I Miss You Baby Girl._

_**Charles_Edwards** : Please Clare ! I Know You're Mad But Just Hear Me Out._

I just stared at the screen. Why after all this time he wants to talk? He did this to my life. He left me and my mom for some older lady. He caused my mother to start drinking and blaming me for every and anything. So being mad right now was such an understatement. I was pissed, anger, enraged, but happy to see he's trying to reach out to me.

But why now? Why is he begging me to hear him out? I have nothing to say to him. I wonder do he even go visit my sister. Why does he feel he has to do this to me. He have no idea what I've been going through. How my life turned out because of HIM. Another Bing came from the computer. I didn't want to read his new message but I looked anyway but luckily it was from Eli.

_**Eli-Golds:** Clare-Bear Are You Waiting For Me ? ;]_

I looked at the screen maybe Eli will know what to do or can at least give me some advice.

_**ClareRockx:** I Need Help._

_**Eli-Golds:** What's Wrong ? Do I Need To Come Over ?_

_**ClareRockx:** No I Don't Think… My Dad Is Trying To Reach Out To Me. He Haven't Been Here For Me Emotionally & Physically For Over A Year & Now He Wants To "Reach Out"? What Should I Do ?_

_**Eli-Golds:** Clare I Can't Say I Know How You Feel, But I Think Maybe There's A Reason Why He's Reaching Out Now. I Suggest You Give Him A Chance To Explain, But I Can Only Suggest. The Decision Is Up To You, Clare-Bear._

I thought about what Eli said and I guess he's right. It's really my decision if I want to let him in or not so maybe that's what I'll do.

_**ClareRockx:** Thanks Goldsworthy._

_**Eli-Golds:** Anytime_

I clicked off the window Eli and I used and went to my dad's screen.

_**ClareRockx:**__ Hey Dad_.

**(Eli POV)**

I logged off the computer so Clare can talk to her father and not switch from the both of us. She was a forgiving person, so I hope her father knows the right things to say. I looked around my room to find something to direct my attention towards but to my luck, my bad luck, I had nothing to do.

I grabbed my jacket from off my chair and walked towards my door until I heard my phone ring. I walked over to my side table where I laid my phone and looked at the screen to notice it was an unknown caller. I wasn't going to answer but something about that number seemed very familiar.

"Hello?" I said preparing myself for the voice on the other end.

"Eli?" It was a female voice. A voice I haven't heard for a very long time, a year and few months ago.

"Susan?" She giggled barely audible.

"Wow, you remembered my voice?" Of course I remembered her voice. But what did she want? Why after so long she's calling me. I thought my message was clear to her.

"Why are you calling me?" I Said uninterested in the answer.

"I was thinking about you a couple months ago, so I asked around for your new number and I found it. I miss you Elijah."

"I don't miss you."

"How can you still be upset?"

"I'm still mad at myself just as much as I am at you."

"Are you still blaming yourself for what happened to Julia? Or you mad for ending us?" That pushed a button.

"Watch it Susan."

"What Eli? Did you think I would forget that night, after all I tried to do to get with you afterwards?" I rubbed my hand across my face. This is so not the time for this.

"Susan, Do you hear yourself?"

"Let's meet up Eli; catch up. Maybe have a little fun of our own." I can hear the smile. I sat down on my bed.

"I don't think so." She sighed loud and childishly. The way I remembered her, loud and childish, but Julia loved her best friend.

"Come on Eli."

"How can you still do this to Julia, Susan?"

"Do what Eli? I told you I wanted you first and then Julia pounced on you."

"I don't believe you, not then, not now."

"Why are you still hung up on her? She cheated on you. She's dead now get over it." I felt my blood boiling through my skin. She pushed the wrong button.

"Susan, I NEVER wanted you. Having sex with you was the biggest mistake I have made and will ever make. You are a psycho bitch who needs help. I still can't believe after all these years; you think we have a chance. It will never happen Susan, don't you get it? I will NEVER want you!" I said with so much venom in my voice, I just hope she gets the clue. We were quiet for what seemed like minutes.

"Eli you WILL realize I'm the one you wanted and come running back to me…"

"Don't hold your breath." I interrupted and hung up the phone.

I Laid back on my bed and closed my eyes. My mind ran back so many months ago until it landed on August 30, 2007.

**(Clare POV)**

_**Charles_Edwards: **God You Answered Clare. How Are You?_

_**ClareRockx:** I'm Fine. What Do You Want?_

_**Charles_Edwards:** I wanted to talk to you Clare. I knew you wouldn't answer if I called so I thought maybe this will be a great way._

_**ClareRockx:** Why after this long?_

_**Charles_Edwards**: I just missed you Clare._

_**ClareRockx:** That's Believable._

_**Charles_Edwards:** Clare I understand if you are mad at me. The only thing I do is send you money in mail and nothing else, so I understand why you're mad. I just want to make it up to you baby girl. After Darcy died things around that house started getting crazy, your mother and I wasn't the same. You were always sad, and the only person I had to really talk to was Janice. That's how I fell in love with her. I didn't keep in touch because you told me you hated me after the divorce was finale. I didn't want to intrude in your and your mother's new life. But I did miss you dearly Clare-Bear._

I couldn't believe what I just read. It answered so much and I missed my dad as well, because being here in this hell hole wasn't exactly what I enjoyed. I remember yelling at my dad when my mom told me he cheated and I told him I hated him, but I was only just a teen, I didn't actually mean it.

I guessed I missed my dad more than I realized when I felt a stream of tears came running down my face. I stood up from the computer and grabbed a box of tissues from a drawer.

I wondered how he and that lady turned out. Do they have any kids? Where did they live? Was my dad's company more popular than before? Were they happy?

_**ClareRockx**: I miss you too dad. And I believe you. _

_**Charles_Edwards: **You just don't know how happy that makes me sweetie. So, how's your mom? How is everything going in school?_

_**ClareRockx: **School is great Dad. I'm still making good grades._

_**Charles_Edwards: **And your mother?_

I wondered how I'm going to tell him about her. Or should I just tell him everything is fine. No I shouldn't _do that. Maybe I should sugar coat it._

_**ClareRockx**: She's good. Working. You know How it Is._

_**Charles_Edwards: **Is everything ok between you two_

_**ClareRockx**: It's ok. Some days are worse than others. _

Uh I meant better.

_**Charles_Edwards**: Worse ? What does that mean Clare?_

_**ClareRockx**: I Mean it as she's still trying to recover from the divorce dad. That's all._

_**Charles_Edwards:** Are You Sure Clare?_

_**ClareRockx:** Yes Dad, I'm Sure. So How Is Janice?_

_**Charles_Edwards:** She great. Getting ready to go back to work, you have a little brother Clare._

This is it. I've been waiting for this. I didn't know how to react. A part of me was happy for two reasons. One reason was because I have a baby brother. The second reason because he was a boy and not a girl. I didn't think I want another sister. The other part of me wanted to be mad, but I couldn't find a reason to, which frustrated me.

_**ClareRockx:** That's Great Dad. Congratulations. _

_**Charles_Edwards:** Thanks Clare. I Will Love For You To Stop By And Meet Him & Catch Up. Janice and I think it's important for him to know you and Darcy._

How can I possibly say no to that? Of course I want him to know about how great his oldest sister was. I smiled at the thought.

_**ClareRockx:** Of course dad. I will love to._

_**Charles_Edwards**: Really? That's Great Clare-Bear. You can email me or write me a message on this thing for later details._

_**ClareRockx**: Okay Dad. That will work. _

_***Door Slams***_

I listened for how my night will turn out as my dad binged in.

"Clare-Bear I Got Some Exciting News" I heard my mother yell from the bottom of the stairs. "I will you about it once dinner is finish. So Get washed up, We're having guest."

Guest?

"Sure Mom. Do you need help with dinner?" I yelled back happy that tonight sounds like a great night.

"No honey, I'm fine. I just need you to get ready for dinner. Hurry our guest will be here in 45 minutes!"

"Ok Mom"

I looked back at the screen.

_**Charles_Edwards**: Ok Love you Clare; Talk to you later?_

_**ClareRockx**: Sure Dad. Mom's home. Got to get ready for dinner. Love you too. Bye._

I shut the computer down and ran to my closet more than excited about the night. I couldn't care less about who is coming. I'm just excited I won't be going to bed in tears.

**(Eli POV)**

_I walked around the in the meadow Julia and I would go when we wanted some quiet alone time. I think Julia only told one other person about this place. So I wasn't really worried if someone will catch me crying here. _

_It's been almost four weeks since Julia died so why am I still like this. I can eat with her. And sleeping is out of the question. How could I have said those things to her? Right before she died. I can never forgive myself._

_I walked over to Morty to get the case of beers I paid this guy to buy for me. Julia and I only did this on occasions and I know she would frown at me drinking while upset but right now I had no other option. I looked at my phone and noticed I had a call from Cece and Bulldog but I didn't care. I threw the phone back into the seat, closed the door and hopped on the hood of Morty._

_I was on my last beer and slightly drunk when I heard my name being called from behind me. I knew the voice. It was Susan Thompson, Julia best friend, well her only friend besides me. Julia, Susan, and I have been friends since the 4th grade when I moved here. _

"_Gah Eli. Everyone has been looking for you. Good thing I came looking for you alone so your spot wouldn't be ruined."_

"_What it matters?"_

"_Everyone is scared to let you out their sight Eli. And your doctor wouldn't like you drinking on those pills you know."_

"_I don't really care."I slurred. Maybe I was dunker than I thought._

"_What will Julia think Eli?" I looked at her face trying to focus on her eyes. But she smothered them with eyeliner so I couldn't tell what she was actually saying._

"_Whatever Susy."_

"_Come On get down I'll call Bulldog and Cece to come get you." She said reaching for my hand to pull me down._

"_No don't call them." I said trying to get down but fell to the ground._

"_You are not fine and you reek." She said scrunching her nose. _

"_Whatever it's just the beer. Just sit me in the back seat. I just need to sleep this off."_

_Susan helped me into Morty in the truck so I can lay down and rest. She grabbed my phone and climbed in besides me._

"_I'm not leaving you here. I'm just going to text Cece and tell her you're fine." She said texting by then._

_I closed my eyes trying to collect myself and my thoughts but everything was cloudy. _

"_Eli" Susan said. I looked up at her. "we all miss Julia and I know you loved her but this isn't healthy."_

"_You don't understand."_

"_Maybe I don't, then again maybe I do. She was my friend too. I knew her longer than you did."_

"_I was in love with her. She was my girlfriend."_

"_Eli you're only 15 this isn't the end of the road you know."_

"_I don't want to talk about it."_

"_Julia is not the only person in the world."_

"_What are you getting at Susan?"_

"_She's not the only girl that wanted you Eli."_

"_Oh really who else wanted the weird Goldsworthy kid?"_

"_I Did"_

_If my eyes could pop out of its sockets it would have just then. My mouth dropped. I didn't know what to say. Susan wasn't an ugly girl but I never thought of her that way because she was my friend, Julia's best friend, and she simply wasn't my type._

"_Look Susan you are pretty but we will not happen."_

"_Just think about it." I gave her an incredulous glare._

"_Are you serious? Julia JUST died."_

"_Better now than later right"_

"_Wrong" I shook my head. The alcohol started to take its effect again. Susan pressed her lips on top if mine. I pushed her back._

"_What the Fuck"_

"_Don't think about it Eli." She said trying to unbutton my jeans. My head got clouded as she started kissing on my spots._

…

_I hoped up trying to figure where the hell I am. I looked outside and the sun was just setting. I rubbed my hands against the back of my neck when I realized I didn't have anything on. I looked to the side of me and noticed Susan naked and staring at me. _

_The last thing I remembered was drinking on the top of Morty. I looked up and back at Susan scared to ask the most obvious question._

"_What happened?" She smiled and looked at me._

"_We happened" I stared looking for my clothes. What in the hell have I done? _

"_No No No.."_

"_No what Eli" Susan sighed and tried to kiss me._

"_Move"_

"_Whats wrong Eli"_

"_Why Susan? Why did you do this right now?" And happened came rushing back to me with an impeccable force. "Put on your clothes so I can go." I said getting disgusted._

"_Eli look let's talk about this"_

"_I have nothing to say but this" I pointed between me and her "will never happen. EVER." She started forcing her clothes on obviously mad. I made a terrible mistake and I know Julia is in Heaven disgusted with us just as much as I am._

_I climb out the back once my shoes were back on and went to the driver side and got in. I started Morty when Susan got out. I was about to drive off when she came to my window that was let down._

"_Once you realize that I'm right call me. Until then I will be waiting."_

"_Don't hold your breath" I said and pulled off._

"I'm Sorry Jules." I said knowing I won't get a response. I looked at the clock and noticed it was 6:30. I sat up thinking what I'm going to do. I thought of Clare but this was around the time her mom was home so I would wait until later to see how things went with her dad.

***Knock***

"it's open" I said standing up to talk to whoever it was . It was Cece.

"Hey Honey." She said and I sat back down on my bed.

"Hey Cece."

"I wanted you to come with me to one of my new client's house for dinner."

"Uh Cece"

"Come on Eli. She has a daughter around your age. We're just going to go over hair stuff afterwards. It was nice of her to invite us." I thought about it for a moment. I didn't want Cece to go to some stranger's house alone.

"Sure let me grab my coat."

"Thanks baby. I'm driving. Let's give Morty a break." She said as she walked away. I agree that Morty needs rest, but I think she didn't want to pull up to strangers house in a hearse.

**(Clare POV)**

I ran down stairs to help my mom to prepare for dinner.

"Do you need any help?" I said once I got to the kitchen and see my mom is dressed casually with her hair looking she got something done to it. "Your hair looks great mom" She smiled at me.

"Thank you baby" She said shaking her hair so her new curls can bounce. "And if you set the table that will help a lot."

"Sure mom" I smiled and went to put plates and silverware on the table. My mom came in with one hand behind her back and handed me some new champagne for her and the guest.

"Our guest has a son a little older than you so you two will be drinking soda. I brought your favorite… Dr. Pepper." She pulled the Dr. Pepper from behind her back. It was my favorite and she knew it. It was nothing to get excited about if you are on the outside looking in; but it meant a lot to me.

I heard a car pulling into our drive way. It was dark so I didn't try to look outside. My mom ran back into the kitchen to check on the food.

The doorbell rung and I straightened out my shirt and jeans. So I will look presentable.

**(Eli POV) **

Cece turned onto a familiar road. "What's this client's name?" Cece looked at me and smiled.

"Nervous?"

"No, Curious"

"Her name is Diane, Eli" She said as she slowed and turned into the driveway of a house I knew too well. With my luck I should've guess it was Clare's house. Then something hit me. How can I look at her mother knowing I know what she does to Clare? This should be interesting.

We got out of the car. Once we made it to the door I noticed I looked down at my clothes I wore to school and wished I changed.

Cece rung the doorbell and thirty seconds later a pair of beautiful blue eye landed on mine.

**-Author's Note-**

**i Hope You all Liked It. I Have To Get Back Use To Writing Again.**

**Please Review && Thanks ! :)**


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